My wife Mary Jo
- This topic has 4 replies, 5 voices, and was last updated 8 years, 10 months ago by
.
-
Posts
-
Dear Mike,
So sorry for the loss of your wife. What an amazing love story….45 years. Sending prayers for strength, peace and comfort.
MelindaDear Mike,
Thank you for sharing such a wonderful tribute to your wife and the life you shared. I have known a few this year who have lost loved ones without any warning. If there is any positive thing about this disease, or other illness, is that for some it is a wake up call to live each day and appreciate your loved ones. However, it sounds like you and Mary Jo already knew the importance of love and life. I truly wish for you that it could have been 65 or even 75 years.
I am very sorry for your loss.
Catherine
Dear Mike,
I am so sorry that you have lost your dear wife Mary Jo to this disease.
There definitely is no right or wrong here. You and Mary Jo made the decisions that were right for you. Take some comfort in knowing that she died peacefully and that she is no longer suffering or in pain. Part of her will always be with you in your heart and fond memories.
I can totally relate to what you are going through as my story is much the same as yours. My husband passed less than 2 months from the first symptoms. That was 7 years ago yesterday. I found this site a few days later and have been here ever since. The help and support of all the wonderful people here is phenomenal.
In time the pain will lessen. It will always be there to some degree, but it does get better and we learn to live with it.
I am glad you have found us and have shared your story with us. I hope you will continue to visit the site as it is a great support system for those who have dealt with this disease. No one but those of us who have can truly understand how it affects everyone involved.
Take care Mike. I wish you comfort and peace.
Hugs,
DarlaDear Mike, I am so very sorry about your dear Mary Jo and please accept my condolences but I have to tell you that your post is one of the most beautiful love stories I have read. What a great tribute to your love. Please know that you did all the right things and that the love you have for each other will surpass time and space, believe me I know first hand. I also believe Mary Jo will always be with you but she would want you to live life fully and be happy and that will happen in time. Below is a poem I love and think of it as Mary Jo sending it to you:
If I should be the first to go,
And leave you alone, my Dear,
Let not your heart be lonely,
Nor in your eyes a tear.
Grieve not for me, my Darling,
I’ll not be far away,
With petals of love and tenderness,
I’ll pave for you the way.
To join me in our sanctuary,
And ne’er again we’ll part.
Grieve not for me, my Darling,
I live within your heart.
Take joy again in living,
As you did in years gone by;
God knows what of he’s doing,
And not be questioned why.
Grieve not for me, my Darling,
My life with you on earth
Each moment filled with happiness,
And love so few be worth.
I’ll be waiting for you Sweetheart
Where skys are ever blue,
With eager heart and open arms
Patiently, for you.
Grieve not for me, my Darling,
May faith and my love keep.
Your soul filled with contentment
Eternally, I sleep. By Mary HarrisIn March of 2015 we had a great time in Florida for the month. On the way home Mary Jo had some minor pains in her side and nausea. On April 13 she was diagnosed with intrahepatic cholangiocarcinoma basically bile ducts and liver plus some other plumbing in the area. Our first oncologist said it was too far advanced for any treatment and he suggest that we go and enjoy the summer and fall as best we can. Of course we went for several more opinions and tests but basically got that same story. We did get one guy that would put her in a clinical trial but warned it would not extend her life and could result in severe pain etc. Who would opt for that we thought.
we did enjoy the summer including dancing at a nieces wedding just 10 days before she passed peacefully and quietly in our home just 4 months and 12 days after the original diagnosis. We did bring Hospice in and they were great. We got married when we were 19 and she passed one week after our 45th anniversary.
My point is if she would have opted for the clinical trials we would not have taken the trips, laughed near as much, or had our last dance which was wonderful. Seems to me that there are options to ICU’s and pain. I am not sure what the future holds for me without her but I know a part of it will be missing her everyday and I hope and pray for the day cancer becomes like polio and something we can vaccinate away.
Also I am not sure there is a right and wrong way for each of us to treat this cancer. We all must pick our path and feel the best we can about taking it.
- The forum ‘General Discussion’ is closed to new topics and replies.