newbie – not sure how much to step in on Mom’s care
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- This topic has 6 replies, 6 voices, and was last updated 14 years ago by devoncat.
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December 5, 2010 at 3:21 pm #45122devoncatSpectator
Hi Marj,
Welcome to the site.I would strongly suggest your mother get into the hospital if she has been vomiting for several days. Her electrolytes are most likely all off and that can be a real problem. It can affect steadiness on feet, heart rythms and confusion.Kris
December 5, 2010 at 4:25 am #45121slittle1127MemberDear Marj – You must do waht you need to do for mom’s safety and comfort. Have an open discussion with your siblings and maybe your mom – talking openly about how difficult it is to see someone suffer and that you want to help by contacting the physician for meds, etc. It’s a difficult road and I’m not sure that the patient is always able to make the best decisions about their care. My husband makes most of his own decisions regarding care, but I have always had to make the appointments and take him in for pain medication increases (which happens about once a month). I don’t override his decisions, but I provide as much support as possible. Keep coming here and talking – it really helps. Blessings, Susan
December 5, 2010 at 12:28 am #45120lalupesSpectatorDear Marj, I’d like to join the others in welcoming you to this wonderful site. I’m sorry I can’t add anything to Marion & Gavin’s comments, but I wanted you to know we’re here for you. I Know that sometimes it’s really hard to know what to do for the best, so please do let us know how you’re getting on.
Julia
December 4, 2010 at 11:41 pm #45117gavinModeratorHi Marj,
Welcome to the site. Sorry that you have had to find us all, but I’m glad that you have joined us here. And if you’ve been reading the posts here since May when your mum was diagnosed then you will know that we are a very frindly bunch and also that you will get a load of support from us all here.
With reagrds to vomitting, my dad had a lot of troubles with this for some time, and as Marion has said to you, this can be relentless and will not stop. One time with my dad, the vomitting was so bad that I had to take him to the docs and my dad had to take a basin with him in case he vomitted, and this was only a 5 minute drive away from my dads house. There are a lot of meds out there that can help with vomitting, and indeed my dad tried a lot of them and also varying combinations iof meds to try to get to grips with that. One thing I was told by a cancer nurse is that when someone switches to a new anti nausea med then it can take a few days to see if it is working or not. I so hope that this new med works for your mum.
I agree with Marion in that you mum should be seen by someone, and I am happy to hear you say that she has agreed to check herself into the hiospital tomorrow. I hope that the docs can figure out what is going on with your mum and that they can then do something for her. And I will be hoping for some good news for your mum with her CT scan on Monday.
Please do not feel guilty about anything, you are doing the best that you can for your mum here. This is a tough situation to be in, I know that as I was my dads carer during his fight with CC and I saw what he went through. Keep coming back here, we are all here for you and we know what you are going through right now. And please let us know how your mum is doing.
My best wishes to you and your mum,
Gavin
December 4, 2010 at 11:18 pm #45119marjSpectatorThank you so much for your reply. I’m comforted to know that you and the other members are there to help & support.
I have been in touch with the doctor again. The anti-nausea suppositories he prescribed last night are helping a bit. Mom really wants to hold off on being hospitalized, but realizes it may be the only way she can handle the CT scan scheduled for Monday. She agreed to check herself in tomorrow at the latest so that maybe the doctors can figure out what’s going on now.
She hasn’t had chemo in 3 weeks, so I doubt the nausea and vomiting are from that.
Many thanks again!
December 4, 2010 at 9:57 pm #45118marionsModeratorHello Marj and welcome to our site. I would contact the physician. The vomiting can be relentless and most likely will not stop. From what I have experienced anti-nausea medication given intraveniously is much more effective. Also, suppositories worked well for my husband. Either way, I believe that your Mom needs to be seen by a professional.
Please, stay in touch.
Best wishes,
MarionDecember 4, 2010 at 8:24 pm #4424marjSpectatorI’s a new member but first visited in May of this year when mom was diagnosed. She was at MSK in NYC for a Whipple, but they closed her up b/c tumor had spawned spots on her abdominal wall. She’s been tolerating chemo of just Gemcitabine well (her choice to not add Cisplatin), and had a mostly normal quality of life most of the time.
She went thru a rough patch in August when they had to replace a stent and was hospitalized for a week. She’s dreading going through that again.
She’s been nauseous & throwing up on and off for the past week. She spent an afternoon at the infusion center just for fluids. Another CT scan scheduled for Monday.
I called her oncologist last night – he sent a Rx for a different anti-nausea med. She’s actually worse today – not really holding down liquids.
How much should I press to get her to go to the hospital? She lives alone – I’m a mile away & check in on her once or twice a day. I feel guilty calling her doctor against her wishes.
I have 4 older brothers & sisters who help out & advise, but usually I have to make the call as her health care proxy.
Thanks for reading. Blessings & peace.
PS – Mom is 78. Dad passed away 2 1/2 years ago of complications from esophageal cancer & heart disease. She originally rejected idea of chemo flatly based on watching Dad go thru chemo.
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