Info/advice Needed for Dad’s Stage 3 Bile Duct Cancer
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Hi UCLA,
My dad was also recently diagnosed and I have found this site and all those who respond to be extremely helpful. Aside from what others have posted, I wanted to ask if your dad is being seen in Southern California. My dad is with Kaiser, and we went to UCLA for a 2nd opinion, which was basically the same as Kaiser’s treatment plan.I’m not a big believer in survival rate information (my dad is diagnosed with Stage 4 but no obvious symptoms), as I think anything is possible and you never know what miracles can happen. Please feel free to email me directly if you have any questions about the 2nd opinion at UCLA or if your dad is with Kaiser, I can let you know more about our experience so far.
Keep positive, and focus on those things you have control of (grades, studying, etc).
Wishing you and your family the best during this journey,
Lourdes
UCLA……I agree with what has been said….obtain another opinion and stay positive. Your Dad will need the support and the ability to look forward to something as positive as you graduating. You will make him proud. And, we will be proud of you also.
USC might be a good place for a second opinion. Anthony El-Khoueiry – USC Norris Comprehensive Cancer Center- and Dr. Lenz at the same institution both, are very familiar with this cancer.
All my best wishes,
MarionUCLA,
I am going to somewhat echo what others have said, but maybe with a slightly different tinge.
I am a bit (ok .. a lot) of a control freak and I am very analytical by nature. When my dad was dx
Dear UCLA – I think your dad will be strong enough to see you graduate. He is at Stage 3 and there are 4 stages. I would do as Lainy said and get another opinion or two. You are in a major university and there are others very close so check them out for who has the most experience with CC. It is a rare cancer so you want the most knowledgeable, experienced doctors to tell you about the treatment options for your dad. Klatskin tumor is common in bile duct cancer and you can use the search box on top of this page to get more information on that and CC. Do your best at school and graduate – you will have plenty of time to help with dad, spend time with him, research cc once you have graduated. Let him celebrate this major life goal with you – he will be so proud. Keep posting so we can keep up with your progress and your dad’s. Breaking down and crying is very good for you – if you try to keep it inside, it will break down your health, your mental outlook and depress your spirit. Get the feelings out and then graduate and love on your dad. Blessings, Susan
Hi,
As being a father and a patient myself,may I suggest the best and most practical thing you can do for your dad now is to graduate from UCLA in June.He will be there and strong enough to see you graduate. It is the best gift that a father can have when seeing his children up there shaking hands with the chancellor of the university and later taking photos and hugging by his children who has just gone thru a milestone in his/her life and the bright future is ahead of them.
I will do the research for your here if you allow me to do so;so don’t worry and remember as the bible said in 1Corinthians 10:13 “God is faithful and he will not let you be tested beyond your strength,but with the testing he will also provide the way out so that you may be able to endure it.”
good luck and be a UCLA graduate to make your father proud.
God bless.Dear UCLABRUIN, welcome to our wonderful family. People react differently to situations and perhaps your parents feel it is better, until you graduate, to not have this on your mind. I personally feel the more someone is not told, the more it is on their minds. Guess I would sit down with them and tell them what the not knowing is doing to you and how it is affecting your last 2 months. They may even feel more relieved in telling you the whole story. Let them know that you need to talk about it and also to your friends as you need your friends for support. I have always felt, about any situation, that it causes more damage when hidden than when out in the open. We cannot give you a prognosis, we are not born with expiration dates. We have survivors who have been here for more than 5 years, one gentleman is in his 14th year. We do not listen to statistics but we do believe in 2nd and 3rd opinions. Where is dad being treated? I hope they will talk to you and honestly, once a treatment is put in to action, everyone feels better because something is being done and the fright turns in to fight. Please keep us posted as we do care.
Hi,
Thank you to everyone who has been reading or contributing to this forum. I find it very helpful since there seems to not be that much info about this. My family is leaving me out of the dark on my dad’s situation and I am hoping I can get some answers here.
My dad was diagnosed with stage 3 bile duct cancer recently. He had typical symtoms (e.g. jaudice, itching, etc.) but it was relieved after a surgery sometime in early March (I think they removed or put in something. From what I have been reading on the forum, I believe it may have been a stent). Symptoms first appeared around end of January 2011 and cancer was confirmed on March 28 (I remember this because it was my first day of my last quarter at UCLA. I am graduating in June). The cancer is unresectable. Surgery is not an option He will start his first chemo treatment in the first week of May. I believe it is extraphaletic bile duct cancer (I remember seeing ‘klatskin tumor’ in the medical records).
Can anybody provide any info based on the info above? What is the prognosis? How serious is stage 3 (I’ve read that there are 4 stages…)? How will he be after chemo? What can I do to help when I come home on the weekends? Should I tell my close friends?
I don’t know what is going to happen and when I think about it, it consumes my thoughts to the point where I put off studying for school and will research info on the internet. I graduate in less than two months and I’m worried my dad will not be strong enough to see me graduate.
I’ve read that the 5-year survival rate is very low…in 5 years I will be 27 and I highly doubt that I will be married at that time so it makes me sad to think that my dad may not have the chance to see the person I will marry, etc.
It’s difficult because I do not know how to deal with this. I sometimes forget about it and then i feel guilty for doing so. My brother told me to be positive, but I find it harder and harder each time. I think I’m not supposed to know about the seriousness of the situation because my family doesnt want me to “fail” out of school, but my brother and sister keep me somewhat informed. I’ve cried twice over this, but today I just let everything out and cried the worst I’ve cried in recent years; my best friend walked in on me and comforted me.
Any info/advice would be greatly appreciated. Thank you!
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