A Little Lost but Trying to Find Our Way.

Hello Everybody,
I’m back! I haven’t posted in awhile. I am going to throw this out there right now. I am a emotional mess. I don’t know, what to say or what to write about my feelings. They are everywhere. So, if I continue to ramble, blame it on emotions. So, many of them. (Deep Breath & Begin)
Ok! So, my Mother had her whipple surgery in July 2010 and recovered quite well. She did the radiation treatment and managed well enough through that. Had a scan done in January & was told she was cancer free.(We were all elated) But she had a bulging arota, that needed to be repaired. Apparently, the doctors knew about this, they didn’t tell any of us and waited to see how she progressed after her radiation treatment. So, they did that surgery in April. She recovered from that surgery and was doing well. She has done remarkable with her recoveries. She has been quite strong and has kept her positive thinking all along. In May, she started to develop jaundice and her stomach was very bloated. She was also starting to experience swelling in her legs again. She had several test and prodecures done to locate the blockage, that was causing her jaundice. She had a prodcedure done to drain the fluid in the stomach.
Which brings us to the present. This week, they did two procedures to insert a tube into the bile duct. First, was a tube with an external drain & second, was to replace the external drain with a tube draining from the bile duct to the small intestine. The second procedure was unsussessful. This is where things get messed-up. After her second procedure, the doctor told us that she had scar tissue from the radiation to close to the bile duct, that inserting the tube would only collapse in a day or two. He said, that they only had one area of the liver, they could work with because of the cancer growth. (WHAT!) We were all in shock, we didn’t understand. They told us she was cancer free. One of the test was on the fluids, they drain from her stomach, showed no signs of cancer. So, what’s up with that. The doctor consulted with my Mothers cancer doctor and came to us within 30 minutes.He then told us that there are tumors in the liver, whether they are cancerous or not, he doesn’t know. (I think, he does). He also said, that my Mothers cancer doctor, has no plans to proceed with any further surgeries, procedures, cancer treatment and testing.
What does this all mean? Where there was hope, there is none. Where you believe a doctors word, you can’t. Are they only dealing with one crisis at a time, not telling you the whole story. (Probably!) Why tell us anything at all. Why tell us only the good news, only to find out they left out the bad. What’s the point in that? How are you suppose to deal with that? We are totally unsure, whether she has cancer or not. Most importantly, and here’s the kicker, my Mother doesn’t know. She is busy recovering from these two procedures. We are now put in the position, of not sure what we understand is right or wrong and we can’t tell her.
Honestly, what does this mean? Really, where are we? What is next, after my Mothers recovery? So, many questions and living on raw emotions.

Christine
Emotionally Unstable Since Friday! (EUSF)
OR
The Rambling Fourth Child! (TRFC)

You decide which or both!

OK…Just talked with my Mother. The ultrasound went well yesterday. They said, they didn’t see any blood clots. Great news! One less thing to worry about. Process of limitination. So, now we have to figure out, what else is causing the swelling. My Mother had the results sent to all her doctors, to review as well. Now we, just wait for Monday. She sees the surgeron, Dr, Huesh, to see if they are going to do the surgery or not. Hoping and Praying for the right answers, whatever that may be.

The swelling hasn’t changed. Still the same swelling, but no worst. She is feeling well enough to try to go grocery shopping with my dad, for a few things. She said, if she gets tired or her legs hurt to much, she’ll just go sit out in car. She said, she did well yesterday, going out to get the ultrasound, so she was going to try shopping today. She dosen’t want to be held down. I told it was great, just don’t over do it. What a ‘good old gal’!

Well that’s our update. I’ll be updating again, after the doctor’s visit on Monday.

Christine

P.S. While we are in the waiting mode. Plan on getting out of here for a little break. Going camping! Floating on Saturday and going to try to catch as many fish as I can. Love the outdoors. My heaven on earth!

Marions,

My Mother said, that she is elevating her legs more often than before we talked. The swelling has not changed. She thinks, that maybe they are a little bit worst. She said, that the swelling is above her knee now. She experience extreme pain, when she bumps them or even scratches them. Good news, she is having an ultrasound done on them, tomorrow morning.. So, we will see what the results are soon, whether her legs has blood clots or not. I’ll keep you updated. I’m sure I will have more questions and concerns.

Thanks!
Christine