Applying for Disability insurence

I am about to apply for disability with the insurance policy that my employer has.  I know that we are eligible for compassionate allowance with social security. Have anyone had experience with applying for disability with a private insurance company. As I understand it you apply first through the private insurance than to SS.  Any help. If you want to resound off line, please eel free to write me at waynewmeisel@gmail.com.  Thanks, Im really stressed out about this …  Wayne