CC diagnosed for the baby of the family

Discussion Board Forums Introductions! CC diagnosed for the baby of the family

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  • #40408
    vzimarino
    Member

    Gavin:
    Thank you for the welcome. I will be visiting the site frequently as questions or concerns pop up.

    Victoria

    #40407
    gavin
    Moderator

    Hi Victoria,

    Welcome to the site. I am glad that you have joined us all but I am sorry to hear about your little brother. I can’t really add anything to what Jemima and Marion have said to you, but I just wanted to join them in welcoming you here. My dad was diagnosed back in late summer of 2008 and I guess that I was fortunate in that he lives about 5 minutes away from me. I was his carer during his fight and I was able to see him each day and take him to all his docs/hosp app’s etc.

    And no you do not sound like a “Debbie Downer” here. Having to deal with this and everything that it involves is not easy at all, and I guess that it must be harder for you living away from your brother. You are doing the right thing in coming here and you will get a ton of support and help from us all. Please feel free to ask any questions that you have and we will all help if we can. I know it took me quite some time to get my head round this when my dad was diagnosed, but coming here and everyone here helped me enormously.

    I am glad to hear that your brothers attitude is good and that he is tolerating the radiation and the chemo well, hopefully this will continue for him. We are all here for you.

    My best wishes to you and your brother,

    Gavin

    #40406
    vzimarino
    Member

    Jemima: I did not mean to exclude you from this response. I was able to visit as soon as I got the news. We had a great time together ( we always have been close and enjoy each others company, we are 2 1/2 years apart in age). Again, my brother’s attitude is awesome and he is tolerating radiation therapy and chemo very well which ofcourse is a blessing. Thank you for your concern, Victoria.

    #40405
    vzimarino
    Member

    Marion:

    Oh, thank you so much for all of your tips. Some are I kind of knew, but many I had not thought of. Fortunately, my brother is pretty techy and has been smart enough to record all major Dr. visit sessions which he sends to me. I will also tell you that I am going to retire from work April 2011 and then I can come and go as I please even at this long distance ( I’m just hoping my brother lives that long,I expect you understand how very vague the oncologist are about survival time when a person is first diagnosed with stage IV metestisized CC to bones. I’m still trying to digest it all. Brother Ned is very positive and spiritual about it all. I just don’t have that kind of faith. I sound like such a “Debbie Downer” but am still trying to rap my head around all of this.

    Thanks for your interest and concern: Victoria

    #40404
    marions
    Moderator

    Hello vzimarino and welcome to our site. Not always do we have the ability to be close to our loved one’s when help is needed however, as Jemima has mentioned to you, there are many ways of becoming involved.
    The below is cited from NCI/Long-Distance Caregiving
    It can be really tough to be away from your loved one with cancer. You may feel like you’re always a step behind in knowing what’s happening with care. Yet even if you live far away, it’s possible for you to give support and be a care coordinator.

    Caregivers who live more than an hour away often rely on the telephone or e-mail as their link. But assessing someone’s needs this way can be limiting. You know that you would rush to your loved one’s side for a true medical emergency. But other situations are harder to judge. When can you handle things by phone, and when do you need to be there in person?

    Finding Contacts

    Many caregivers say that it helps to explore both paid and volunteer support for the patient. Try to create a support network of people who live nearby. These should be people who you could call day or night and count on in times of crisis. You may also want them to check in with your loved one from time to time.

    You could also look into volunteer visitors, adult daycare centers, or meal delivery. Having a copy of the local phone book for your loved one’s area can give you quick access to resources. Checking the white and yellow pages online is useful, too. Give your phone numbers to your loved one’s health care team and others for emergencies.

    Other Tips

    Ask a local family member or friend to update you daily by e-mail. Or, consider creating a Web site to share news about your loved one’s condition and needs.
    Talk to electronic or computer experts about other ways to connect with people. New advances using video and the Internet are being made every day.
    Airlines or bus lines may have special deals for patients or family members. The hospital social worker may also know of other resources, such as private pilots or companies that help people with cancer and their families.
    If you are traveling to see your loved one, time your flights or drives so that you have time to rest when you return. Many long-distance caregivers say that they don’t allow themselves enough time to rest after their visits.
    Consider getting a phone card from a discount store to cut down on long-distance bills. Or, review your long-distance and cell phone plans. See if you can make any changes that would reduce your bills.

    I hope this helped and please, continue to reach out to us. We are here to help.
    Best wishes,
    Marion

    #40403
    jemima
    Member

    Dear vzimarino

    I am sorry to hear about your little brother and that you have been put in the situation that you have to find out about CC. None of us wish that we had to but this forum is the best place I have found for help, advice and support.
    Being so far away must be really tough for you. Both my brothers live far away from our mother who was diagnosed in Feb 2010. They often ring and email for information and I try to give them as many details as possible as to her treatment and how she is doing.
    I think if you are a long way away then it is good to be as informed as possible so that when people are telling you things then you can relate to them a bit better and know what is going on. Have you been able to visit at all or will be able to in the future ?

    From what I have read on here radiation for bone mets seems to bring help alot so hopefully your brother will get some relief soon.

    My thoughts and best wishes are with you and your family.

    Jemima

    #3838
    vzimarino
    Member

    My little brother has begun his cancer battle. CC, stage IV that spread to his bones (spine, hip, shoulder). Multiple tumors in abdoman and spine. Radiation treatment began with some urgency on his spine and gemzar/xeloda chemo began on 5th day of radiation. I live 1400 miles away from my brother and I feel disheartened I can’t be there and feel helpless.

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