July 6, 2010 at 7:56 pm #38176
I too am very angry about this cancer. Dave is only 52. We have a 9 year old. This is a man that has never been sick a day in his life. He was taken down hard, and we still are struggling. He is dealing with swelling almost daily now. BUT..for my nine years olds sake, I have to be positive, I have to think that we have beaten it. I know the facts, and I know what is to come. I just have to look at Faith right now, and hope, and seperate it from the science. When I look at some of the long term survivors on here, it gives me hope. I remember my first day on this site, I just kept reading for someone who had beaten it, or was beating it. I am very scared. I feel like we are being stalked by a stranger, and I never know when they are going to break in our home, and take my husband, and my hope away from us. So, I fight. I just keep thinking positive, not letting my guard down until I have no choice. I hope and pray that you have success as well, I know that ride you are on, and its not fun. I know your comment was not meant to hurt, it is ok.
Lainy…I think of you daily, and you are in my thoughts and prayers, you and Teddy. Hugs to you both.July 6, 2010 at 5:41 pm #38175
Hi Isisman, I totally agree about the anger frustration and mental anguish we as Care givers have. In the end though it doesn’t really help us or our loved ones.
To be honest I have not broken down yet and I am dreading the day I explode. I always like to say we are “realistically optimistic” even in what we are now facing. We so believe it is Teddy’s attitude that has got him this far. In fact when we go home this month he has an appointment to see his surgeon who did the Whipple as he wants to thank him for the 5 year “gift” he gave him. You can choose to live with the upset or to rejoice in your life together. In the beginning Teddy did so well and there were many on this site not doing well. I felt so guilty writing about his success but I soon learned that people were depending on his positive outcomes to give them the hope they are looking for. There is no right or wrong, everyone handles things in their own way it would just be such a shame to waste what ever time is left on negativity.July 6, 2010 at 4:21 pm #38174lsismanParticipant
There is a lot of anger and upset that caregivers hold inside them. I may not sound optimistic but Iam realistic and there will be no surprises in my life, not after this one. Maybe I’m angry reading success stories because I’m not sure if I will have one (that my husband will survive). I’m sorry for any rudeness, anger or upset and will refrain from negative comments. Sorry ladybug. I have hope and faith but what we want may not be the plan and that needs to be ok too. Please accept my apologies ladybug.July 2, 2010 at 2:34 am #38173kathybMember
We all have different personalities and different ways of expressing thoughts.
Beth, I rejoice in your husband’s success story. Thank you for sharing such good news. We all need to keep the hope.
Isisman, I do not believe you were being rude or negative, just stating how you felt on the day you responded.
We never know where someone is at on this journey. I appreciate how the people on this board are accepting of our differences.
KathyJuly 1, 2010 at 10:02 pm #38172
First off, You are being VERY negative. At this point…Dave does not have the CANCER, tumor has been completely removed. At the time the article was written that was and still is his status. It has been my experience, and that of many on this site that one way of getting through this is to have HOPE AND FAITH. These people come to this site for inspiration, hope, information, and encouragement. I am certain that there are those that will agree the “Good News/What’s working” section is no place for a negative post. Dave and I are VERY aware of the statistics, and have been informed of them at EVERY doctor visit. As his caregiver…I give him hope. How else would we make it through the day to day. Oh…and there has been a follow-up article. Dave was chosen as the Honorary Survivor for this Year’s Relay for Life. You should have seen how proud our 9 year old daughter was seening her daddy lead the way of all the CANCER SURVIVORS!!!! EVERYONE ON THIS SITE HAS A DIFFERENT STORY TO SHARE, AND IT IS ALWAYS TO ENCOURAGE OR LOOK FOR ENCOURAGEMENT. I FOUND YOUR RESPONSE RUDE. PERHAPS YOU MAY WANT TO USE YOUR EXPERIENCE TO ENCOURAGE OTHERS, NOT TO GIVE THEM THE “WHAT IF’S AND STATISTICS!!”
(the caregiver and spouse of that miracle man for 17 years!)June 15, 2010 at 9:22 pm #38171lsismanParticipant
I don’t know and I hate to burst a bubble, this CC affects everyone different and from what I have learned, no oncologist or radiologist will ever tell a CC person they are cancerfree when they complete treatmetn and have clear tests. We were told that with this cancer you have to have clear tests for 2-3 years before you can think of saying cancer FREE. Said if it is gonna come back, it usually rears its ugly head in that time. I agree it is a great article but my husband has this CC and I consider myself very educated on what CAN happen. I hate sounding negative, but this CC is not a good thing, or easy to beat. I do hope the couple in the article never have to have a follow up article !!!!!June 4, 2010 at 4:21 am #38170linda-zParticipant
Reading this gives us ALL hope. It IS possible to beat this….so hears to all of us beating this cancer to the ground and succeeding as well as Bob and Dave if not more (continued health).
My best to all,
Linda Z.June 2, 2010 at 1:54 am #38169RandiParticipant
This thread absolutely made my day! Thanx to all. I am on cycle of chemo post Whipple 6 months and I have had some pretty dark days. Reading this really gives me hope for the future. Keep up the good work and here’s to many healthy days ahead!May 31, 2010 at 3:59 am #3816832coupeParticipant
Congratulations!! You and Dave do make a great picture of enduring love. I am blessed to be a 13 year survivor of CC. 13 more years with the ‘bride of my youth’; time to participate in two of my sons weddings; see three grandsons be born; see my oldest grandson graduate from high school; see my grand-daughter (who happens to be my heart) complete her sophomore year of colledge and just recently learn that my newest daughter-in-law is pregnant with their first. It doesn’t hardly get better…
I say this not to boast – I’ve done nothing but get up each morning and try to live my life well. I’m sharing this to encourage hope and faith. Dave too can be a long term survivor. I was 51 yrs. when I was diagnosed and am now 65. May God extend His grace, mercy and peace to the Graff household.
PS. I’d love to be around to read of Dave’s thirteenth year…May 16, 2010 at 2:59 am #38167
Gosh oh gee, Beth, you make me blush. Want to meet? Come on out here to Phoenix anytime. Where are you in Illinois? We are actually from Milwaukee, that suburb of Chicago? Next time we go back to Wisconsin we will have to arrange a meeting. Darla from Wisconsin also wants to meet. We usually go back in July but not this year as we are not sure what is up with Teddy yet. You guys are great! I am so addicted to this Board I may have to have surgery some day to remove the keyboard from my hands!!!May 16, 2010 at 1:47 am #38166gavinModerator
Great to read this piece about Dave and thanks for sharing it with us!!!!
My best to you both,
GavinMay 16, 2010 at 12:29 am #38165
Lainy, I love love love you! I would love to meet you! Your energy just pours out in every post!! Thanks so much!!!!! xoxoxox
dmeek, WOW!!! A 6 YEAR SURVIVOR!!! THAT IS AWESOME! I CAN’T WAIT TO SHARE THAT WITH DAVE! KEEP ON KEEPIN ON!!! HUGS TO YOU!!!May 15, 2010 at 3:57 pm #38164
OMGosh, Beth & Dave. That is just awesome!!! You also make one heck of a beautiful couple! I had tears in my eyes as I read the article and of course Teddy & I wish you just everything healthy and good for years to come!
First Lisa makes the paper then you, we may be on to something here. Just loved it all!!!! You are survivors and heros. YEA!!!!!!!!!!!May 15, 2010 at 2:02 pm #38163dmeekParticipant
Wonderful story!! And congratulations to Dave as Honory Survivor in his RFL! I wish Dave continued success in his cancer journey. I’m a 6-year survivor of cholongiacarcinoma, and there is Hope for us all with this rare cancer. Best to Dave and God bless!May 15, 2010 at 12:01 pm #3552
Getting awareness out there!!!!
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