Festive month?

Iris,

I will keep you and Peter in my thoughts and prayers. My Mom passed away on Nov 2nd but was diagnosed with this cancer 2 weeks prior so we didn’t have much time to prepare for it. We did have the time to say our goodbyes because she was in pretty good spirits up until the last 2 days. So we are very fortunate to have had that time with her. It is only my Dad and my Brother in my immediate family and we are very close so it has helped us get through things. I know the Holiday’s are difficult and my Mom was the type of person that wanted the entire family and extended family together on those holidays. Thanksgiving was hard and especially when my 5 year old daughter said a prayer for her. She said “I’m glad my Grandma isn’t hurting and she’s with God now but I miss her” which we all thought was special. Just enjoy the time you have left with him. Tell him how much you love him. That is one thing I regret. I didn’t tell my Mom everyday that I loved her and I wish I would have. She spent 3 weeks in the hospital and it wasn’t until then that I told her every time I saw her. It’s not that I didn’t love her, but as a young adult, I just never said it. Try and keep your chin up and know that we’re all thinking of you.

Becky

Iris,

What a nice tribute to Peter & one that you both can be proud of. Enjoy this special day and try to keep smiling! I will be thinking of both of you today & will keep you both in my prayers.

Love,
Darla

Iris,

It is hard to celebrate Christmas when one is so beaten down by this unforgiving cancer and it can be even more cruel in its timing, stealing your Christmas spirit, Cherbourg’s joy at her daughter’s wedding, any good news or celebration is made bittersweet by what hangs over us. But we must try to hang onto every piece, every morsel of life while we have it, not let our joy be stolen.

My sister had her baby as my mother lay dying, the contrast between life and death could not have been more glaring and our emotions were a mess, celebrating his joyous birth as we wept. My mother got to spend 2 weeks getting to know my nephew before she lost consciousness and I see only pure joy on her face in the pictures we have of her with her new grandson.

I agree with Jeff, don’t celebrate Christmas, celebrate Peter’s Christmas, treasure every moment of it. I will pray that he makes it til then and that the joy of the holiday spirit touches you both.

Patty

Dear Iris-A, I’ll be thinking of you and Peter. You know Iris, I look around and once again just like years before; christmas lights and trees going up, the television shows playing the traditional movies,and advertisements for the best bargins. I’ts going to be happening with or without us. I tried to put our angel on top of the tree, but my ribs where so sore, I couldn’t reach! My wife reached over and did it for me. I felt like crying but all the chemo has ruined my tear ducts. Love and comfort the man you cherish and let the light shine and there be festival spirit just for him and you. Make it your own little celebration with Peter. Let Peter know this christmas is for him. You can celebrate the birthday of our Savoir and give thanks for the time he was able to let you and Peter spend together. Although you and I both wish our time with our loved ones could be longer. They will always be with us for sure! Light the candles Iris! At least this last time with Peter. The hussle and bussle of christmas will come again year after year after year, for many who don’t even know what Christmas is all about. Make this moment one to remember and be happy and each year this time we or they can have more cheerful memories instead of sad ones( well the sadness will) always be there, but at least it’ll be more bearable.
God Bless You Both!
Jeff

Oh Iris,

I know how you feel! This has always been my favorite time of the year and this year in addition to the holidays we have moved my daughter’s wedding up a year due to the diagnosis of my Mom and the deployment of her groom back to Iraq in January.

I have been home since Sunday in bed with a horrible bug and missing work and not getting anything done on my daughter’s wedding which is on the 20th of December. This is a time I really want my Mom to be with me. I’m thankful to God that right now she is hanging on, doing reasonably well and able to go to church and out with my Dad. She is an amazing woman. Her diagnosis was an incidental finding when she had a bout with pleuracy while still working full time at 76. I didn’t lose my grandmothers til they were in their mid nineties and fully expected to have my Mom with me for a much longer time.

I hate this horrible disease. I know the rage and frustration about this monster. Please know that you and your dear Peter will be in my thoughts and prayers during this holy season. I know that God has a plan and while we can’t always see it, I know that He is there for me.

Please remember to take care of you the caregiver. Peter is lucky to have such a loving spouse. I wish I could take away all of our pain and sadness. Know that you are only a computer away from those of us that really understand what you’re feeling.

Take care of the both of you.

Cherbourg

Iris,

I know & feel your pain. My husband Jim passed away 3 months ago from this horrible disease & I too am not going to enjoy this holiday season. None of us asked for or deserved this. It is so unfair. I wish I could do something to ease your pain, but I know that there is nothing anyone can do to make it better. Just know that you & Peter are in my thoughts & prayers along with everyone else’s on this site. I know it isn’t easy, but try to take care of yourself so you can be strong for Peter.

Lots of Love & Hugs,

Darla