Front row tickets to hell
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Dear Kerryn,
I am so very sorry indeed to hear of the passing of your dear Father. Please accept my sincerest condolences. I too know that pain of losing my dad to this disease as he passed away in 2009. Please know that my thoughts are with you and your family right now.
Gavin
Kerryn,
You and your family have my deepest sympathy. My husband went quickly, much like your dad. It helps me to think that atleast he did not linger and suffer for too long from this horrible disease. I know how hard it is, but knowing that he is in a better place with no more pain or suffering does help. He will always be with you in your heart and memories.
Love & Hugs,
DarlaKerryn,
I am very sorry for your loss. A Father and Daughter’s love is very special. I hope your pain becomes fond memories soon.
Love, -Pam
To The Proud and Much Loved Sugarplum Fairy, I am so very sorry about your Dad but in time you will see that he is all around you, do Dad is going to truly leave a loving daughter like you!
You were very lucky to have that special love shared between daughter and father. I believe that in Heaven there is only the moment. The beauty is that one day, you will meet again and no time will have passed. There is a reason why pain is meant to be part of our journey. It allows us greater depth of feeling which also allows greater heights of joy.
Dear everyone
I have gone quiet because it is all over now. He left hospital 2 weeks ago with no chemo or radio done as I said in a prior email. He had one week at home. Then one week dying in hospital. My father was told a few years ago that he had the heart of a 17 year old. This was a curse because it prolonged the agony of the final coma. He died in our arms 9 weeks after his first symptom..
I have decided that there is one thing to say about this sorry waste of a great man.
Life throws up challenges. Life is unfair. The sooner we realise that the sooner we can get on with our lives.
I wish to thank everyone on this site for their messages of support. They have helped immeasurably with the heartbreaking of moments.
All the best
Kerryn (a very proud sugar plum fairy)Sugar Plum, take each day one at a time, build those memories with your dad. My husband had a successful resection and he then had a good 18 months. He started turning yellow and was given less than 6 months. He lived another two years from that day. Never give up hope and never accept no for an answer. Put your questions to your dad’s doctors and make them think outside the box when they do say ‘no’ or ‘it cannot be done’.
Keep the faith!
Hugs,
MargaretDear Sugar Plum Fairy: I completely understand what you are going thru. I lost my very best Dad in the whole world four and a half years ago to this dreadful cancer. He was diagnosed stage IV and we had him for an incredible year and five months. When I had to tell my boss that I would be gone for awhile, that my Dad wasn’t going to make it, I started crying, and all he said to me was “love, love, love”. At the time I was thinking “what the heck is that comment”. But I completely understand now what he meant – and it is simple – LOVE, LOVE, LOVE – spend all of your days and moments filled with love. Say what is in your heart, and love your Dad with all of your heart. It sounds like your Dad is awesome and so was mine – one of the gifts that they give us is the gift of strength and that strength is what got me through losing him. One thing is for sure, it is never the same without them, but it does get easier and the memories will fill your heart to carry you through the really tough times.
I have another set of tickets to hell myself – now my Stepmummy has been diagnosed with CC – as incredible as that seems – a husband and wife with the same rare cancer. She is who helped carry me through the grief of losing Dad. I can’t even imagine losing her….take good care of yourself and remember to Love, Love, Love.Hi SPF,
I am so sorry you are going through this also. My mom lasted 8 weeks and a day. My dad wasn’t with my mom anymore so I took care of her for 5 weeks and then she went into the hospital and didn’t come out. It is a horrible unbelievable nightmare that makes you wake up every morning scratching your head wondering how your parent was the unfortunate one to get this obscure cancer. The only thing I can suggest to you is be with your dad as much as you can. I soaked up every minute with my mom and am so glad I did now.We are all here for you. This sight is a refuge for anyone that is touched by this horrible disease. How lucky you both are to have a close relationship like you do!
Take care,
ChrissyI wish all the very best SPF- I cared for my husband at home in his final days which also came so very abruptly. My OH was only 42 and our little girl not quite 2years. These days are so very precious for you just take them as they come. I do not know if you believe in the Holy Spirit and I hope I am not speaking out of turn when I tell you that I got great strength from Holy Spirit in those final hours and days.
The priest at his funeral said, All lives are short just some are more short than others.
Do not waste your energy now worrying about grief- enjoy this time sharing memories with your Dad.
Chirssy
You can have dad stay at home. My mother refused to leave the house. So we hired a woman 24/7 to live in, and we have hospice coming to the house as needed. You need not leave your home. Stay in touch and keep me posted on how you are, I am here day and night!
Hugs,
RoniSugarplumfairy…..there is nothing wrong with speaking with hospice at this time. You will receive valuable information and can put everything in action whenever extra care is needed.
I also wanted to mention that elevating your Dad’s legs will help decrease the fluid buildup.
Thinking of you and sending tons of hugs your way,
MarionDear Sugerplumfairy, my dad’s cancer was also detected at a late state. He had a few plastic stents inserted, an attempted resection, and two sessions of chemo. In the end, we made him comfortable and spent our days loving him. You are doing a great job and your dad appreciates it. Keep coming to this board for support. It helped me so much. It’s been a little over a year since I lost my dad and it does get easier. I hope he has some good days ahead. Pam
Dear Roni
Thank you for your thoughts and words. We now have Dad at our home. He has a fair few enjoyable moments but things are getting just a little harder.
Lainy thank you again for your suggestion to start looking at hospice care. We were talking about it but didn’t know when it would be appropriate to go to it. There is a nice one a few minutes from our house.
I might go and have a look tomorrow.Dear SugarPlumFairy,
I received my tickets when my mother was 65 as well. She had the whipple August 2010 and by the grace of g-d is still alive, she is in bed, 75 pounds and now on liquid morphine.
I feel your pain, I understand exactly what you are going through, and I am here if you need to talk. You can call me 443-394-6163 or you can email me at ronidinkes@yahoo.com or you can find me on facebook.
This disease is unique, rare, and I am watching it destroy my mother. It is devastating to watch, and it tears your heart apart. I also have kids, a 11 year old and a 13 year old who are coping with this horror as you put it perfectly.
It is wonderful he helped you paint your house, he is in everyone room. He will be forever in every part of your home and its beauty.
Stay in touch, please know you are NOT alone, we are here with all ears, love and tons of hugs!
Love,
Roni
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