May 9, 2012 at 10:30 pm #60786marionsModerator
Joe…I also would like to welcome you to our site. Your spirit and determination are infectious and I wish for all good things to continue.
Joe, I read your inspiring stories and wanted to point out to you a special section dedicated to blogs.
Due to the high amount of postings on our site, threads can become lost – the blog section will prevent that from happening. Just wanted you to know.
MarionMay 9, 2012 at 5:28 pm #60785ccfighterParticipant
Dear Biscuit02… Attitude is Everything… What we have in our Hearts shall overflow from out mouths… MY prayers will be with you and your Mother. If I can offer any advise, it would be to release anything in our hearts we are holding. Give away to God anything we are holding too closely. I would have to say finding peace of mind, has played a very important part in this journey.
About week 4 I made a mistake of looking for positive results from this disease, and found most to be very bleak. I stopped… For I knew it was like a a thief which was stealing only my hope.
So… Never stop believing… Never…
I hope my witness of my journey can be a light in a very dark place.
If you have any questions, ever, no matter how hard, please ask, and I will expose my soul and share my deepest thoughts, fears, and revelations I have had so far with my battle.
Encouragement is the seed we need!! Peace be with your Mom and comfort with you… JoeMay 9, 2012 at 3:55 pm #60784biscuit02Participant
I too got goose bumps reading your post, reading this gives me some hope for my mother. She was just recently diagnosed stage IV cholangiocarcinoma and give at the most 1 yr w/treatment, she is in her 3rd wk of treatment of Gemzar and is doing good, we will know in 6 wks if it is working and I Pray that it is. I continue to pray to God that he heals my mom and does not take her to soon from us, I truely do believe in the power of prayer… Good luck to you and keep us posted!!!May 9, 2012 at 3:25 pm #60783lainyParticipant
Welcome, Joe! I must say I got chills reading your post and all I can add is to keep up the great work all around you and wish you continued success. Please keep us posted on your progress as we truly care.May 9, 2012 at 2:12 pm #6800ccfighterParticipant
Good Morning… My name is Joe, On Oct 2, 2011… 4 days after my 48th birthday I went to the hospital with pain in my right side. At first doctors where pretty sure I was dealing with an appendicitis. The ran a CT Scan and return 20 minutes later saying… you have an extremely large tumor in your liver 11.5 x 9.9 x 8.5… You could have heard a pin hit the floor!!
Fast Forward to Nov 4, 2011… University of Chicago… Stage Four Inoperative Cholangiocarinoma. 9-12 months typical, being young and healthy maybe 24 but much more would be a dream. Only option life prolonging measures.
Stunned would be an understatement. For about 30 minutes, I was doing just as he told me… Going home to get my affairs in order and die. Then I said NO Way… I refuse to accept this answer!!
Nov 16, 2011… Cancer Treatment Centers of America… Same answer, very difficult disease. In liver and nearby lympenodes and one distant. At least what is detectable at this point. I asked the doctor, how can I expect this all to end, how will I know since Outside some minor pain in my side, I felt great. He said lets not talk about that right now… lets talk about fighting. Lets see if we can get some results with Chemo. That evening I started with Gem and Cicplat…
This journey has been nothing short of amazing. from the physical, emotional and spiritual aspects. On Nov 4th, I weighted 284 lbs, c-19-9 where 31400. On Nov 5th members of the church came to the house, A church and people I did not know… anointed me and prayed.
Nov 6th I weighted in at 272… lost 14 pounds in worry and grief. But on Monday the 6th, after prayer from others and honestly me begging God for my soul… not my life, but for my soul… My mind started to view this differently.
On Nov 16th… Weight 280, C19-9 where 3069… Down over 21000 with only prayer we started the treatment. With every treatment we sat with the drug on our lap, hands on it with anyone nearby that wished to pray. We prayed that my body would receive the drug and it would seek out the cells it needed to kill and do just that. and we prayed in faith.
Dec 28th, 2011 Weight 290lbs, c19-9’s 309… Had not been sick once… Tumors and lympe had shrinkage.
Jan 15, 2012 last chemo we could get on schedule as my platelets would not recover. Each week we would test at home plates would be good to go, get there and the would have dropped..
Then again… more blood issues 4 weeks without… Started Juicing, taking all the supplements they suggested. I found myself asking God, what if this and what if that… and one morning he answered… “Joe, you are so focused on a disease that is trying to steal your life and you are so focused on it you are giving it what you have. so focus on the disease or Me, but please pick one” I picked Him.
Next treatment Feb 14th… Everything Good… Got treatment. next scheduled for Feb 22, Blood checked at home on 20th… Good to go… get to CTCA on 22nd platelets too low again. No treatment… Frustrated, I looked at my doctor and said… What if I demand you treat me. He said I would… I would adjust the level and make you sign that it was ill-advised but you are in control of your treatment and I am here to serve you. He said before I do, I want you know know just what you are asking me to do. If you crash your platelets, you can bleed anywhere in your body and could bleed to death. If you are lucky, it would be your nose, we could pack it so tight nothing would come out, but if you where unlucky, you could bleed in your brain, and odds are you would die. And we could do nothing but watch.
Friends my Head was screaming. I have to take control of this, My heart was saying, “Joe, I am in control, leave it to me”. I asked my wife what she thought… she said it was not worth it, I asked the doctor again, he said I already told you how I felt. I said NO Doc, Tell me what you would tell your brother. Knowing what we know. You said the only medical hope I had was to get the chemo in in hopes we would get the tumors and lympe to shrink. With that knowledge, what would you tell him… He said Joe, I would hope I could have a clear enough head without emotion to tell him to wait.
So here I sat in the office… Frustrated, alone, mad, my head screaming someone has to take control, My Heart saying, Don’t do it, my wife saying no, my Doc saying no and him pretending to be my brother saying please wait. So, I did what i never do in life… I backed down.
When I Got home, I went for a walk with God. I asked him to show me… To prove to me, his hand was at work and I should just completely trust and release it into his control and just walk the path which was ahead.
Well… I have had Kidney issues my entire life… I always have stones, even today I have three riding along, but they seldom give me trouble. Well the very next morning when I got up to void, I started passing blood, then I passed several large clots and then it cleared up as I finished. No warning of an issue and no issues afterwards. God clearly answered my request.
That day… that moment, I climbing safely and comfortably in the life boat of Faith in a very Great and powerful God. And I walk now with His will not mind. I will walk this path and glorify and witness of his greatness.
Feb 28th… Doctor walks in… Sorry Joe, Blood is not good cannot do treatment. I smiled at him… said, Doc. I respect you and admire you and you have become a friend as well as my doctor, But… I have more comfort in the promises of God, then the medical profession and of mans opinion and knowledge. I am not giving up, but trusting in faith over knowledge. He said are you comfortable there… I said even more… confident!
He said, Well I think we are as far as chemo is going to allow us to get and we should look at other options.
Here is the Greatness of trusting in God…
On April 4, 2012… 5 months from the day, (A short season) From the day I was told I was going to die and it was only a matter of time. Weight 302, c19-9 at 47, tumors any lympe reduced by 40%… I had a very successful liver resection. Margins were all neg. the nearby lympenode which tested pos on pet and the surgeon said for certain where cancer as he removed them… In pathology tested negative. distant lympe was not resectable but is planned attention of radiation…
Fantastic news… Today… May 9th 2012… I am nearly 95%… my wound is completely healed, my skin looks better then it has in many years and the whites of my eyes are whiter then ever.
On march 24 my mold is being made for Radiation… and between march 31 and June 4th… I start 5 weeks of radiation with chemo as a sanitation precaution.
Now… with all this said… Medical profession has told me I have a 50/50 chance of this all coming back or it being seeded somewhere else and just has not shown up yet.
But… Let me tell you… My mind and my soul are healed… Life whether 30 more days or 30 more years… will never be the same… Never!! I now live with Joy, peace, love, forgiveness, comfort, trust in my foundation, what without this disease I would have most likely never learned to the level I have. My God is an awesome God, both here in life and yes even after I leave.
My future is in God’s hand. I believe in his will. I believe in his plan. I believe had my focus not have turned to him and focused on worldly knowledge… the word of man… I would not be as far along as I am.
So, I have a doctor who uses his knowledge to do what he thinks is best for my physical body, and I have God who I know controls my spiritual body.
Therefore, in my faith, relationship and love for my Father in Heaven and in the name of his son and my savior, Jesus Christ, This is done… and I am Healed!!
God Bless you all…
http://www.cancerbattlecry.org My story (still a work in progress)
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