Hi from Australia
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- This topic has 11 replies, 9 voices, and was last updated 14 years, 9 months ago by gavin.
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March 19, 2010 at 8:19 am #36639gavinModerator
Hi Kate,
Welcome to the site. As you can see, this is an excellent place for support and help for patients, carers, family and friends who have all experienced CC in their lives. My dad was diagnosed with inoperable CC in the summer or 2008 and he passed away in December of last year.
I found this site and all the amazing people here prettty much just after dad was diagnosed and coming here since then helped me so much with everything. I am sorry to hear what happened to your parents, that must have been so hard to try and deal with that at the time. I am glad to hear that you are speaking with a psychologist to try and help deal with everything and I wish you every success with this.
I hope you will stay in touch with us as you will get a lot of support from everyone here.
My best wishes to you,
Gavin
March 19, 2010 at 2:05 am #36638mumkateSpectatorHi TK,
Good to hear another Aussie on here!
My thoughts are with you and I hope your treatment progresses well.
I’m so happy that you have had some options re-treatment, we asked the specialists about radiation, chemo & more surgery but unfortunately for Mum we were given NO to everything, it had progressed too quickly and there was nothing they could do.
All the very best, where are you in Sydney?
Regards, Kate
March 19, 2010 at 2:01 am #36637mumkateSpectatorTo all of the wonderful people who have responded – thank you so much for your replies and kind words – Mark how brave you are, my thoughts are with you and I hope you continue to find strength from this site, your positive attitude has really put things into perspective for me and when I am feeling low I will remember you and your struggle with this – hugs. It is comforting to know that have all been/going through this journey & are at different stages, makes me feel not so alone in my pain. Regards Kate
March 19, 2010 at 1:55 am #36636tkMemberHi Kate,
I was moved to hear that you lost your mum to CC, and then your dad the following year.
I am also from Sydney, Australia. I have a loving wife and 3 beautiful kids.
I was diagnosed with CC and had surgery in November 2009 to remove my cancerous common bile duct and gall bladder.
I am currently in the middle of a 6 month chemotherapy stint as I had a few lymph nodes in that area with traces of the cancer. But everything appears to be progressing well for me.
I just wanted to give you some local support. All the best.
TK
March 18, 2010 at 6:04 pm #36635katieloumattMemberHi Kate,
Welcome to the site where as you have already experienced you will gain a lot of support, knowledge and new friends as well….
I found this site in August ,5 weeks after my beloved Dad died. He was diagnosed in early May last year and died 7 weeks later, like your Mum with no symptoms other than altered blood results. He underwent an unsuccessful liver resection and never regained consciousness.
I am glad that you have sought help from a pschycologist who may help you through your unresolved grief. Good Luck with your sessions and come back to update us how you are doing.
Regards, Katie
March 18, 2010 at 4:25 pm #36634mark-sSpectatorHello Kate and Welcome! I too am relatively new to this site and have been amazed at the wonderful and kind words of support and stories of tremendous courage in the face of insurmountable odds in fighting this cancer that abound on this site.
I am so sorry to hear about your Mother. My wife lost her mother to non-small cell lung cancer in 2008 and yet it still seems so recent…I can relate how tough it is to lose someone close to you like that.
I was diagnosed with cholangiocarcinoma in July 2009 and am now into my 7th month of chemo. Tumor is unresectable but stable right now and I am looking at some alternative therapies. It often feels like I have a time-bomb in my abdomen and some days it is dormant and other days I swear it is ticking away! So I’ve learned to take it one day at a time and try to funnel my energy into positive activities that help others like me, which in turn provide a great deal of satisfaction and catharsis to me as well.
Stacie mentioned your desire to set up a support group down under and I think that is so great of you! We have one starting up at Emory Univ in Atlanta, Georgia and our first meeting is next month; we’ll keep you posted how it goes. I am working with some of the other volunteers to set up guidelines and protocol so that people like you do not have to reinvent the wheel every time they want to start a support group. I’ll keep you posted.
Kind Regards,
Mark SMarch 18, 2010 at 3:57 pm #36633katjaMemberHi Kate,
It’s such a horrible thing, I’m so sorry for your loss.My mum lost her mum to CC in her early 60s, and now my dad has it at 59. My mum has found it incredibly hard, knowing the suffering that my grandma went through. She says she felt so bitter to lose her at what seemed so early an age, and so this time both my parents are trying hard not to be angry. Very difficult though.
I hope that you find some peace, professional help might just make the difference.
Best wishes to you and your boys.
KateMarch 18, 2010 at 1:49 pm #36632darlaSpectatorHi Kate,
My story is so similar to yours. I lost my husband a year and a half ago. He was 62, healthy and less than 2 months after his first symtoms he was gone. There are several on this site that have experienced what you have and are now trying to deal with it all. I know how hard it is. The pain and sadness are always there. I think we just eventually learn how to live with it and try to go on.
I found this site a few days after he passed away and have found it comforting. I have gotten so much help & support and I also hope I have been able to do the same for others who come here. I feel that by trying to help others I am also helping myself.
Losing both of your parents in such a short time had to be doubley hard to handle. I am glad that you are getting help to deal with your feelings.
Take care and stay in touch. The people on this site are so supportive and helpful. Let us know how you are doing.
Love & Hugs,
DarlaMarch 18, 2010 at 12:55 pm #36631lainySpectatorHello, Kate, and welcome to our wonderful family. I am very sorry about your parents, it had to be a nightmare for you. I do agree with you that your Mum would not want you to be so sad because she is watching over you now and she is in such a peaceful and happy place. Mother’s really never leave their children, you know. The speed of CC occurs because often times it is not discovered until almost too late to treat. Not sure if quickly or lingering is better. Personally, I would rather not see a loved one suffer. Have you talked with anyone professionally about your grief? Take care and please let us know how you are doing.
March 18, 2010 at 10:58 am #36630mumkateSpectatorHi Janet,
Thanks for the reply. I’m so sorry for your loss.It’s been 11years but the pain is still so raw, as I mentioned I am working through things now for the sake of my husband & 2 boys and me. I know Mum wouldn’t want me living with such sadness. It is really such a scary cancer as you say – there are often no symptoms and things can take a very dire turn in such a sort time. In some ways we are glad that Mum didn’t have to endure more surgery, chemo, radiation to have it only return (as is the case with alot of cancers) but the speed at which it just took over was quite unreal.
The other thing is that people often say that it’s better when you have time to say goodbye but from someone who has had that time with Mum and then lost my Dad the year later very suddenly to suicide – there is no easy way.
I hope you have progressed further along the grief process than I have as we know life is too short and we have to enjoy every precious moment.
Kind Regards, Kate
March 18, 2010 at 10:49 am #36629magicSpectatorKate it is very shocking ,the speed at which this cancer can carry people away.I am an RN and have seldom seen the speed of a cancer like cc in my work.I lost my husband within 3 months at the age of 58 and it was picked up during a routine mens health check with no symptoms.This is a great supportive site but unfortunately even though there are some success stories here there are many like your mum who die so very quickly Janet
March 18, 2010 at 9:19 am #3328mumkateSpectatorHi, my name is Kate and I’m from Sydney/Australia. I have just found this website and so wish it was around when we lost our Mum back in 1999 to Bile Duct Cancer. There was no information around for us then and little support. All we knew was that it was so rare and that basically when you are diagnosed it’s usually terminal. Our wonderful Mum was diagnosed on 1/4/1999 and we lost her on 26/5/1999, she was working the day she went into hospital to remove ‘suspected gallstones’. That time seems like only yesterday so much so that it seems that I am still ‘stuck’ in grief process, I am currently seeing a Psychologist to work through the grief process as I feel like I am living like we lost her only yesterday, she was such an amazing mother,women and had so much love to give. I truely miss her everyday and so wish that she didn’t have to leave so soon. I really think that I am going to find peace in reading others stories on this site and hope to offer support to others if I can. Regards Kate.
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