Joyce Moneypenny
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Dear Missing U,
I was just thinking of YOU also, after seeing your posts – I know we lost our dear parents at around the same time. My mother died January 22, 2007. Thank you so much for thinking of me – you ARE following in your father’s footsteps in your kindness.
You are an inspiration to me, though lately I’ve been following in my mother’s footsteps only in her feelings of depression at the end — I can’t seem to shake it, this anniversary is so overwhelming, more than I thought it would be. I have also donated to various causes, mostly the ones my mother donated to (I still receive her mail and all the charities she gave to send prodigious amounts of mail), but lately I have just immersed myself in memories and depression. On the anniversary, I went to her gravesite alone and gave her flowers and spent an hour talking to her, though it was freezing and started to snow. I finally got up the courage to look at some of the videos of my mother with my daughter – the last one just a month before her death, the two of them horsing around like two goofy kids. Those were the everyday moments, like you said, that you miss the most. It’s heartbreaking and impossible to share, to convey. My daughter is still grieving and she just turned 5.
I, too, wish you peace of heart and spirit. I know your father would have been proud of you – and WAS proud of you, while he was here. Just as I know that my mother was proud of ME – but it’s so hard to keep going on when my rock and my best friend is gone – so hard to imagine a future without her there. In my good moments, I always think “What would Mom do?” and I try to take it from there. She loved laughter more than anything.
With you in sympathy,
JoyceHi Joyce, I recall that your dear mom passed into spirit a few weeks after my Dad did. It was one year on the thirteenth of January that my Dad left this world. I have been trying to live my life in honour of his. Whenever I have a bad day I think to myself that my bad days can’t even compare to his best days when he was sick… that quickly shifts my perspective to a more positive one.
I miss him so much… not even the big moments, or the special occasions… the normal, ordinary moments in his company that we so much take for granted. I so much miss his smile. I was wanting to do something to commemorate his life on the 13th and was watching a fundraiser on Operation Smile, where doctors go to third world nations to operate on children with facial deformities. Right away I knew I had to sponsor a surgery for a child. I imagined it as a way for my Dad’s kindness to live on if I was doing it in his memory. I also imagined it as a way for his wonderful smile to touch another person, just like it did so many times on this earth. These types of things make me feel better and closer to him.
Still… losing one so dear as my Dad and your mom changes us forever. There will always be a hole in our heart in direct proportion to the depth of our love for them.
Thinking about you at this time and wishing that you have peace of heart and spirit.
Missing U
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