life is unfair and frustrating
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Dear Hopeful Daughter:
Keep oh believing! My husband Tom was told in Nov. ’09 that he had ‘possibly’ 6 months to live, that radiation and chemo would not help, just go home and get your affairs in order. I did not like those words and did not listen! Instead I put on my boxing gloves and went to find other doc’s who would maybe give us a little bit of hope. Of the three other oncologists we saw, the all agreed that the new tumor was inoperable, but they disagreed with the first oncologist and said that radiation and/or chemo ‘COULD’ help. After 28 rounds of radiation and then oral chemo – then iv chemo, Tom is still here and in a few days it will be two years since that oncologist said there was nothing that could be done.
Just goes to show that 2nd and 3rd opinoins are well worth seeking and that is why we firmly believe that they are necessary! If we would have listened to that oncologist, I know that Tom would have certainly passed on well within that 6 months. His bilirubin was over the top at that time, about 25,900 and currently is being maintained at between 6,000 – 8,000 with an external drain.
Tom was 61 when he was diagnosed and will be turning 64 this coming Feburary. So in total since his diagnosis he has underwent a major surgery where they removed 75% of his liver (a resection not a whipple) and for 18 months we had a ‘normal’ life….until he started turning yellow. But we have had a lot of firsts during that time as well. We had two new grandsons. One of which was named after his Papa and is the apple of Papa’s eye (and Grandma’s too!). Tom united with his first born daughter and she and her husband and their two children are now a part of our lives. We have another grandchild on the way, due in early April.
Tom was jus told that the cancer may have spread to his right lung as there is a hot spot that was not there on the last scan. But we are NOT giving up. Tom plans to still be here for a long time to come and says he is not going anywhere!
STAY POSITIVE and get your mom to other doctors to see what they think!
Go with God and KEEP KICKIN’ THAT cancer.
Margaret
Hopeful,
I just can’t do justice by adding to what has already been said. I love the saying, “Hope springs Eternal”. Hope is what gives us strength to overcome anything, endeavor to do anything, etc etc etc. Just be the best person you can be and take one day at a time, never giving up that hope. In the end, regardless of how many years your mom continues, you will build a relationship that will be priceless and eternally lasting.
God bless you, your mom, and your family.
Dear Hopeful…
I can ditto that, life is unfair and I can’t begin to tell you how this horrible disease had robbed us of the most amazing person that had ever lived on this earth, and that’s my husband Jerry, who was taken away from me at the age of 49 from CC. I don’t wanna be negative but just have an open mind and try to think about the good things in life, like the precious days you spend with your mom and still enjoying those days and some more days to come…I have you in my prayers…Thank you very much. I think it was harder to handle because he had told us he thought he could cure her with the whipple. Then the night before he drops the bomb that there not only is not a cure but she has a short time left. I do appreciate all of your support and prayers.
Stay hopeful- never look at time dates.
In time, hopefully many years away, you will look back at how strong you were and feel great pride in how you enjoyed life with your mom, everyday even the really tough ones.Trish…..I am so sorry to hear the news. Please, stay strong and let’s see what the oncologist has to say. Your Mom is still young and has much to fight for. We have seen many surprise us with the best of news when little hope had been given.
Hugs and all my best wishes,
MarionDear Hopeful, I am so very sorry to read this but please keep the first part of your name here, “HOPE”. I know we have had members in the same position and they have proved the doctors wrong. You know how I always say try to be realistically optimisitc and no matter what happens use this time to make more cherished memories, we should all do that all the time. We are here for you and I am sending prayers and hugs!
The surgeon called and told us that the laparoscopy showed a mass in the liver, a mass on the pancreas and the washing from her abdomen were positive for cancerous cells. She is now inoperable, stage 4 and not even a candidate for radiation. He said we can try chemo but he gave her maybe a year to live if we are lucky. I am not ready to lose my mom. PLease keep us in your prayers. We hope to hear from the chemo specialist this week to tell us where to start.
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