Lost my husband Rick, what to expect in the final stage
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- This topic has 20 replies, 14 voices, and was last updated 16 years, 2 months ago by ejoy.
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January 14, 2008 at 10:01 pm #18721janecwMember
Robyn, I am so sorry for you and Rick it’s so unfair and cruel why does this happen to you and all these kind good people. I can only imagine the pain you have been through I don’t know whether this is the right site but I can’t pray and believe in God, I’m past that, nobody good and kind would put good people through this.
I’ve seached for positive news for weeks and it hasn’t come. I’m fnding it hard, very hard, your pain must have been so unbelievable and I don’t know how you cope with that.
I don’t even know how to end this post so I’ll just go take care of yourself please you deserve that x
January 14, 2008 at 2:47 pm #18720lisaSpectatorRobyn, I’m sorry for your loss. Rick was lucky to have you with him. I often think about the wives and husbands of those of us with cc, and how difficult it must be for them. I’m not married, and wish I had a spouse who could love me and take care of me when I need it.
January 13, 2008 at 9:02 pm #18719karenSpectatorRobyn,
My thoughts and prayers are with you. I feel an ache knowing that this is probably in my future. Whatever you can enlighten us with, when you feel up to it, would be appreciated. Bless you.
KarenJanuary 12, 2008 at 10:57 pm #18718carol58SpectatorRobyn, I’m so sorry for your loss and I’m sorry Hospice was no help to you. I’m glad you and Rick had a good summer together. Take care. Please post more as you feel like it. I’m sure it would help a lot of people.
Carol
January 12, 2008 at 10:23 pm #18717jeffgMemberDear Robyn, My deepest sympathy and condolences. Yes when your up to it I would like to know what happened at the end, especially concerning hospice not being of any help. Whenever my time comes I want to make it as easy as possible for my wife if that is possible.
God Bless,
Jeff G.January 12, 2008 at 9:48 pm #1028robynharMemberRick was diagnosed in Feb 07, and it was a long year. He started chemo and that was short lived. We had researched and found chemo to be more harm than good with this particular type of cancer (when questioned the doc finally says “its all we can offer”) So he chose good diet and living fully until he could not , and we sure had a good fun filled summer. After his stent to the bile duct, he got most of his energy and weight back. Ahh but the cancer does have its way. He started failing about Oct, and luckily it was quick. Weakness, loss of appetite, abdominal swellig and later acites, more weight loss and weakness, then the inability to eat at all. more weakness, I could not lift him, shower etc. Thank God for good family and friends. I found Hospice to be little or no help, I will post about that later. I did not do research on them, as everyone says they are wonderful. Not so for me. Now I am knee deep in the business end, funeral arrangements or I should say party , celebration planning. Everyone needs death certificates! Its hard to grieve and do all this too. After his death family came in waves and it seemed all I did was entertain when I wanted to veg out. I finally said Im going to the barn and left them, but when I came in another group was there. So I was exhaused and I know they were trying to be there for me and respected that…. I am getting thru it, and just cant believe I am awidow at 54. It is very scary even tho I have been very self sufficient.
If anyone has any questions about what happens toward the end (as I did ) please ask. For you who have not been there, everyone is different but I could have used more Heads UP (hospice was not helpful for me one bit) It gets lonely at night, but I am filling my evenings up with lot s of things to do and that helps. This site is so helpful, it was a Godsend to me. -
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