Missing Charlie at Christmastime and always
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Thank you all so much. You do my heart good. Kris, you can email me anytime. Ben is at Appalachian State. He’s having a tough time, but I think will be okay. Sarah is still at home with me attending Winston-Salem State to get her teaching degree. I’m still looking for work. I’m sure things will get better. One day at a time. You all are always in my thoughts and prayers too. Much love, Carol
I found this on a website. A Christmas Prayer for those who have suffered the recent death of a loved one:God of compassion, there is such a hole in my heart! Today should be a day of joy, but I feel only emptiness and loss. While the world celebrates around me, I remember Christmas celebrations of the past and I long to have my loved one with me. I bring my sorrows to you, Lord, like some odd gift of the magi and dump them at your feet. In my blind tears I wonder if anyone can possibly understand the depth of my sadness.
I know, you can. You sent your son to be with us in our deepest sorrows and I know that even though I might not feel it now, you are here with me, grieving with me, caring for me in my sadness. Dearest lord, help me to turn to the one I miss so much today and speak. Help me heal the loss of our parting and help me not to regret the things I didn’t say. Sorrow tears at my heart, but today I ask that my loss soften my heart and make me more compassionate with everyone I meet, so that my loss may become a gift to others.
Carol,
I, as well as so many others on this wonderful site, can totally understand your pain had heartache. It has been 2 years since I lost my wonderful Jacques, and every day is a journey, but not a day passes that I do not think about my Jacques. Some days it seems like it was yesterday and others it seems like an eternity. I know my Jacques walks with me, and no matter how heavy my heart is, I am taking it one day at a time, and trying to be the strong person he so wanted me to be. This is an especially hard time of year, but somehow our wonderful memories pull us through. You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers. Take care and I am sending you heartfelt wishes and love from New Hampshire.
Peace,
BarbaraCarol,
I am delighted you have come back for a bit. I have wanted to email you so many times, but I didnt want to intrude. In fact, I have checked Charlies caring bridge page to see if anything had been posted. I know this will be a difficult Christmas for you and the kids. It will be difficult with all the firsts without Charlie. You are right, he would want you to be happy and movve forward, but you will do this in your own time when it is right for you. You are allowed to greave as you need to.How are your children doing? Is Ben in college yet?
Kris
Hi Carol,
So good to “hear” from you. I totally understand the feelings. It has been nine months for me and it feels like yesterday and an eternity. My prayers of comfort to you and your family.
Namaste,
KarenCarol,
It is good to hear from you. We understand how you feel, and wish you well as you continue on your journey to wholeness and peace. It does continue to get better as time heals us, not good, but better. Just know that we are thinking of you and wishing you well.Hugs to you,
Joyce C.
Carol,so very nice to see you back here.You know I know how you feel and we will get through this holiday period.Hope the kids are ok Janet x
Merry Christmas Carol, good to see you! I think also that the bottom line is what Charlie would want and in his memory you eventually will go forward. He will be right beside you and proud of you no matter what you do.
We are always here for you and always like to know that you are feeling OK. We know its not great but OK is good for now. We are thinking of you and sending good thoughts your way.Merry Christmas to you too Carol. It has been almost 16 months for me and it is still hard, but you are right, all of our loved ones would want us to go on. We all know, understand & grieve with you. Just keep taking it one day at a time. That is all we can do. Take care and know that I am thinking of you as we all cope with the holiday season.
Love & Higs,
DarlaCarol…..You are so much part of my life and I am sure also of many others on this board. How nice of you to share with us your thoughts. The first time of everything seems to hard with Christmas being on top of the list for me also. You are in my thoughts and I am sending all my love to you and your family.
Hugs
MarionI feel like I’ve dropped my cc family. I guess because it’s all tied up and so closely related to Charlie’s life and ultimately his death. I love and admire so many people here and couldn’t have made it without you all. You’ll always be a part of my life. I only got through a few posts this time and that’s all I can do. At Christmas, it will be 8 months since Charlie’s passing. Some days, it’s still so painful it’s almost physical. I go to Hospice meetings on how to cope, I read grief books, I pray a lot. It’s still a struggle and I’m sure will be for a while. I always try to remember how young at heart he was and how he would want his family to continue forward and be happy. I know there are many more of you out there dealing with the same issues and grieving. I’m so proud of Kris and all the others who won’t give up. Bless you all. Continue to stay positive. Merry Christmas with much love!!
Carol
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