July 18, 2011 at 9:38 pm #39108ronidinkesMember
there is a wonderful cancer institute in England….July 14, 2011 at 5:04 am #39107marionsModerator
Scottsmum….I too am sorry to hear of your Mom having to excperience pain. Have suppositories been used on her?
My heart is with you and your family,
MarionJuly 13, 2011 at 9:06 pm #39106
Dear Scottsmum, I am so very sorry to read about your Mum. You know, we pass on when we are ready and sometimes it is just a small thing holding one back. I hope she gets to visit with the Granddaughters and maybe that is just the ticket. It’s very hard to watch a loved one go through what she is experiencing. I am not sure but but I thought there were some pain meds that could be taken rectally. I was also thinking of something like a Fentynol patch.
I am send you big prayers and hugs and for your Mum to find the peace she deserves.July 13, 2011 at 8:47 pm #39105gavinModerator
I am so sorry to read your post. I wish that there was something that I could say to help. You and your mum have been so through much and I know how hard this is for you having been down this road with my dad. From what you say, it sounds like your mum is being well cared for. Is she in Stracathro or is she in hospice care right now? When my dad was in hospice here in Dundee, he used to get pain shots when he needed them and that helped a lot. What pain meds is your mum on right now and also, what are they doing for the vomiting?
Your mum is indeed showing her tenacity for life and I know how much she will love seeing her great granddaughters from Ireland. I so hope that your mum will have a great visit from the great granddaughters.
Thinking of you and your mum right now.
GavinJuly 12, 2011 at 3:29 pm #39104
Yet another month gone by and Mum still with us although weak and sleeping a lot.She is talking of “Wanting away” now and who could blame her after nearly five months bedridden and staring at the hospital ceiling when not asleep.She cannot read or watch TV as she lost her sight (with the second stroke)in her left eye and her vision was failing anyway.
She talks of being wonderfully looked after by the nursing staff and doctors at the local infirmary but even they have not been able to keep her pain free despite best efforts.They had to take her off the driver meds about two weeks ago due to running out of sites on her body to install it ,she has been on them so long.The alternative medication is not working as well and she has had some vomiting,and generally not feeling good.
When it looked like she could not become frailer and weaker without actually passing away she has dumbfounded everyone with her tenacity for life.
The great granddaughters are visiting again in two days from Ireland, so God willing she will see them one more time.
My thoughts are with you all who are living through a CC journey.
ScottsmumMay 8, 2011 at 5:22 am #39103mlepp0416Spectator
My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. I know that your Mum and Dad are treasuring the moments that they still have with each other, and for as long as you have your mom, let her know that you love her.
Go with God,
MargaretMay 8, 2011 at 3:20 am #39102
Thanks Scott for the update. I am so glad to hear that Mum is at least comfortable and that is the bottom line. This is the time to make some wonderful memories that will last a lifetime. I pray for her continued comfort and for your strength to hang in.May 8, 2011 at 2:53 am #39101marionsModerator
Thanks Scott, for keeping us abreast. Your Mum is comfortable, easy to visit and no restrictions on the visiting hours. What a precious time for all. May it continue.
Stay strong and enjoy those great moments of conversation.
My heart is with you,
MarionMay 8, 2011 at 12:01 am #39100
Well another month has passed and my Mum did not pass away as we and the nursing staff expected. Weak and thinner every day she continues to hold her own,although she has been unwell twice and we thought not long now.
Both times she has rallied and come back to us.
It has come to be a daily ritual visiting the hospital and my father is there more than the staff,spending all afternoon every day and going back in the evening after his meal.We are so lucky that there is a local infirmary where she is only 5 minutes away or all these visits would not be possible.At the moment she has a side room which gives them good privacy and she can have as many visitors as she likes.
The driver meds. are quite high now ,but of course she has built up a tolerance to them .What would knock us cold is keeping her comfortable and although she does sleep quite a lot she has good periods where she is lucid and can carry on a conversation.
It will be one year on the 13th since she was admitted to Ninewells with painless jaundice.
This is just an update on her journey to any who are following her story.
ScottsmumApril 1, 2011 at 12:41 pm #39099
Dear Scott’s Mum, I understand completely how you feel and what you are going through. My Mom passed 1 month after Teddy. She was 94 and in excellent health for her age except for dementia. I had always told myself that to live so long and in her good condition for so long was a blessing and that we were lucky that way. I never cried. But perhaps I was drained from Teddy’s departure. I think you are just numb. Sometimes we need and deserve a little break no matter how small. There were days that I didn’t see her and my daughter and I took turns visiting. We never stayed that long, maybe an hour or 2. I always felt that was not really her at the end. That is not the beautiful and vivacious woman I knew as my mother. Maybe you can try and change your thinking about IF she goes on her Birthday. I think of it as being born and returning on the same day. Your Mum has shown you another side to her a side of bravery and courage. Her comfort is the bottom line and it sounds like they have her pretty comfortable. I know you will keep us posted.April 1, 2011 at 12:10 pm #39098
I just felt I had to vent a little today what with all the hype about Mother’s Day on TV and her own Birthday coming up on the 6th April, I feel it keenly that I have nothing to celebrate this year ,and will have no mother to buy presents and cards for next year.Having had a mum for 60 years (nearly!)that is going to feel very strange to me.
Mum remains in hospital on palliative meds. for six weeks now and she is still among us while others in the neighbouring beds have completed their journeys and passed over.
It is very tiring emotionally on the family,especially my Dad, who is beginning to look strained and depressed.I don’t know what to say to him anymore,and we sometimes just sit and watch her sleep.She is so frail and tiny now there is barely a bump in the bedclothes where her legs are,and her features are skeletal,so much so that you can barely recognise her. Surely it cannot be much longer now,but I’d not like her to die on her birthday for some reason.She will be 82 years old,a good age I know, but I just wish she had not had the debility of the strokes and CC to contend with this past year and passed with something quicker and therefore kinder.This you would wish for a mother and a friend ,which she is to me.
So sad yet tears won’t come.
ScottsMum.March 7, 2011 at 2:55 pm #39097
Thanks to all who answered , I will take your advice.
To Lainy if you read this -I can put a face to your name- as I watched your video regarding the shameful report of the Hospice where Teddy passed.I was heartbroken to hear of this as these places are supposed to be a haven for people approaching the end of life,not some sort of dying conveyor belt where no one could care less.He deserved so much better as does anyone who may cross their doorway.Now you have to cope with anger and regret along with your grief .
I know they are giving Mum more than she likely needs in the Morphine department and that may lead to things that may shorten life,but at this stage I find that immaterial.She is settled and pain free.
May God take her when he wills ,her body is spent.
ScottsMum.March 5, 2011 at 6:19 pm #39096nur1954Spectator
Dear Scott’s Mum – I agree with Lainy …. talk to her anyway. But also understand that she already knows the kind of person you are and that you will take care of your Dad and that you will miss her. I always say that is why it is so important to do things every day while you have someone. Wishing you all peace and best wishes – NancyMarch 5, 2011 at 6:15 pm #39095nancy246Spectator
Hi Scott’sMum, Your mum is such a trooper, how she keeps coming around and chatting it up and all. She sounds like a real sweetheart. They say the last thing to go is hearing, so I agree with Lainy talk to her now and if you do not get the chance to say everything you wish she will know, she will feel it. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. NancyMarch 5, 2011 at 1:44 pm #39094
Dear Scott’s Mum, if I may make a suggestion having just been on this journey with Teddy, talk to her anyway! Let her know everything because even if you feel it’s too late to talk, she will hear it and you will have said it. Teddy was in control of his mind, in a way, up to the last few minutes until he passed. They know, they just know. Also please accept the Morphine as given as Hospice did NOT give Teddy as much as he had been taking and it was not a good scene. If I had the Morphine from home I would have given that to him myself. It is good that your dad has the mind set he has and I wish all of you a Peaceful journey and Blessings.
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