I went to the big university hospital for my new regime. I met a new ocologist who did his best to steal my hope. Then, when I was too happy and cracking jokes on my cancer, he asked my husband if I was always like this. Hans said ALWAYS. I had to break it down to him that I KNEW the statistics and what would likely happen, but not what would definately happen. I told him I wasnt looking to erradicate my cancer, just shrink it enough for surgery or maintain it long enough for the new treatments to work down the pipeline. I told him I would have hope until the doctors said there was none and that I expected the doctors to tell. Then I looked at him and basically challenged him to tell me there was no hope, which of course he couldnt do. When we met the today, it was much better and Hans thought he actually had a twinkle in his eye. I am still annoyed with him because he got me so upset that I cried which made my mother cry.
Anyway, my new treatment regime is Cisplatin and Gemzar, three weeks on one week off. Let me clarify…both drugs every week, not cisplatin only on week one which seems to be the standard protocal. They still have not made up their mind about the Erbitux, but I feel it seems more postive they will add it than not.
On a side note, I decided to name my tumor Leroy so when I tell it how unwanted it is and how it must leave I can call him by name.