New to Board and need some help

[lalupes]

Dear Oldest Daughter

I cannot add anything to the advice & suggestions others have given you, but I would like to welcome you here, too. I’m thinking of you & your family.

Julia

[barb]

oldest daughter, have you asked the doc for zofran for your mother? that is the one med that has worked for me. it melts on your tongue so it gets into your system quickly. you might give it a try.

sending you loving thoughts as you travel this difficult road.

barb h

[darla]

Oldest Daughter,

I am so sorry for what you, your Mom and family are going through. Yes, many of us have been where you are now. I agree with the others, keeping your Mom pain free and comfortable are of the utmost importance at this time. Yes, be proactive and do whatever it takes to make sure this is accomplished. My thoughts and prayers are with all of you.

Darla

[jim]

Oldest Daughter: My wife passed last November after a 4 year fight. You were very lucky to have had your mom for 7 years post diagnosis. My wife’s last weeks were attended by Hospice, and I can’t say enough wonderful things about about them. True angels of mercy. Definitely a morphine pump, I think, would provide the pain management needed. You have to be proactive, however, and call people – again and again if necessary. Don’t settle for anything less than what it takes to make your mom pain free. The morphine dosing is critical, however – not too much, and definitely not too little. You are where many, many of us have already been. I hope you find comfort in knowing that we understand, we feel your pain, we share your burden, and we lift you and your dear mom up to God and his tender mercies.

[marions]

Hello oldestdaughter

[gavin]

Hi Oldest daughter,

Welcome to the site, although I am sorry that you have to be here and also to hear about how your mum is doing right now. If you use the search function at the top of the page you can search the website for posts regarding nausea from other members, and I hope that this will give you some more answers. My dad had a lot of problems with nausea and felt real bad when he was going through that, so I can relate to how your mum is feeling right now.

Kris is also right that the hospice section may also give you some more answers and suggestions as to what might help your mum. My dad was in hospice in December and I posted a bit about his experiences in that part of the website. As for your mums anti nausea meds, perhaps they need to be changed for other ones. What we were told and and what my dad experienced, was that some meds seemed to work better than others and that we needed to find the right meds for dad. He tried a few different types and combinations with varying success. What we also found was that as dad was vomiting quite a lot, and that his meds were in tablet form, he was not able to keep the tablets down so they were not working. When he went into hospice, his method of getting his meds was changed from tablets to a syringe driver which gave him a constant supply of medication over a set time preiod. This way, he was not vomitting up the tablets and this seemed to work a bit better and helped him enormously with his comfort levels. His anti nausea medication at this point was Haloperidol.

I completely agree with you about your mums comfort being so important right now, and I hope that you can get your mum some help with her nausea very soon. I know how better my dad felt once he eventually got some relief from the vomitting. Please keep coming back here as you will get so much support from us all. Ask any and all questions that you will have and I am certain that someone here will be able to help you.

My best wishes to you and your mum,

Gavin

[lainy]

From one oldest daughter to the other, Welcome to our wonderful Family. I can not say much about Hospice but I have read enough on our Board to know that they are angels. They are usually always excellent at keeping people comfortable and pain free. I would suggest asking your Mom’s doctor what else they might try. So sorry you are going through this, not a journey any of us wanted to take.

[devoncat]

Oldest Daughter,
Welcome to the site. I am very sorry your mother is going through this. I think you might want to look in the hospice section of the forum. I wish I could offer some advice, put as the patient I try not to know the kind of details you will need as I find it a bit scary for me.

There are plenty of members who unfortunately will know the kinds of information you are looking for. Hopefully, they will pop in soon but please check out the hospice section until then.

Hang in there.
Kris

[mlepp0416]

Oldest Daughter:

Welcome to the best site for CC that I have found on the internet. I’m certain that like many on this site, you did not wish to join (myself included). Prior to march ’08 I knew nothing about Cholangiocarcinoma. Now however, I know more than I want to know and learning more each day.

Given your mom’s age and the fact that she has been fighting this cancer for 7 years, you have to trust that she has made the best decision for her and you have to support her decision.

Making your mom comfortable should be something that Hospice can do. Does she have a morphine pump? Does she have another type of pain medication? If not, contact her doctor’s and insist on getting something to ease her pain. My son-in-laws grandmother recently passed and Hospice had a morphine pump for her which made her final days easier for her.

If the nausea medications are not working for her, contact her doctor’s as they may need to change the medication that they have her on.

I would also suggest that soft music playing in the background or having family members being in the room with her, talking softly may also give your mom peace of mind that people that love her are nearby. We as caregivers do not want to see our loved ones suffering, that is the hardest part in dealing with this cancer. I know that when/if the time comes for my husband Tom I will have a very hard time dealing with his end.

What does one say at a time like this? Keep in mind that your mom has made the decision that she feels is right for her and you have to support her. Just be there for her, even if it’s only to hold her hand and tell her that you love her.

Go with God, prayers are coming your mom’s way from Wisconsin.

Margaret

[oldest-daughter]

My 80 year old Mother was diagnosed 7 years ago. After a liver resection she did well until 2 years ago when it came back this time in the lung. She took Gemzar and tried Xeloda. Neither helped substantially and she did not tolerate the treatment well.

Last spring she made the decision to stop treatment. She grew progressively weaker and has been in bed for the last 4 weeks with no food. The pain is fairly well managed but the nausea has been really bad. She is on Phenegren and droperidol (both topical) and was started on marinol 3 days ago. The nausea continues and she is miserable. She is so very weak and is starting to show signs that she may be nearing the end. Our concern is just to make her comfortable. Her hospice does not seem to have any other answers. Any sugestions or ideas that might help?

[Author]

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