Rosina,
Went through the same kind of thing with my mother. My advice would be to talk to him as if he wasn’t sick. In fact, ignore the illness altogether unless he brings it up.
The sickness itself becomes the 800 lbs gorilla in the room, which sucks. Everyone starts asking “How do you feel? You’re pain, take something. Don’t get up, I’ll get it for you.” It would be impossible to feel normal if everyone around you is reminding you that you’re not. Even though they have the best intentions.
I would absolutely hate being the center of attention like that, I wouldn’t feel like I could not get better. I’d probably throw everyone out of my house.
He’s going to handle this, how he handles it. No one gets any say in that, so follow his lead and be what he wants you to be. Even if you extremely disagree.
Joe