Surviving family member testing

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  • #83629
    moneil
    Spectator

    I lost my mom (LadyLinden on this site) to CC on May 14th. I too, have concerns about developing this horrible cancer, even though I’ve been told it’s not hereditary and I know that early diagnosis is rare. I spoke to my doctor and he pretty much told me that they could do bloodwork, check my liver values, but that was pretty much it. My mom suffered terribly in the last months of her life and this cancer killed her in 11-1/2 months. She was always healthy, energetic, full of life, independent, beautiful and so much more – cc took all of these things from her.

    #83628
    suz
    Member

    My sister died from cc. 7 months ago . I was having stomach cramps for a while and went to my Dr and explained about my sister and asked her to please screen me for CC. I’m 64. So they did a CAt scan and some other tests and I was diagnosed with IBS but no cancer. So it gave me peace of mind. I am so sorry for your loss.
    Suz

    #83627
    lainy
    Spectator

    Oh, Gee, Now I remember. Maria just called me and I told her about you. Well, that statement he made just shows the humor he had right up to the end! He had attitude, humor and a really strong mind. I used to say even his enemies loved him! Thanks for reminding me of this. I love the Memories and you too will begin to have lots of Memories about your Mom that will make you smile. You are just wonderful, your parents did a magnificent raising of you!

    #83626
    seek
    Member

    Oh Lainy, no way you can’t remember this:

    ” I will take a bullet for you too Sis… What the heck, I don’t have anything to lose anyway”

    In that meaning…

    Emad

    #83625
    lainy
    Spectator

    OH, Emad, I remember that now, oh my gosh, but do not remember what Teddy answered. You are giving me goose bumps, that you read that and I don’t even remember writing it. Maria and Teddy were very close as he was 10 years older and really took care of her. He bought her first doll and gave her, her first allowance, 25 cents a week! She and I are very close and she is in Ft. Worth but calls me almost daily since he passed. We are crazy good together. I am also blessed that Teddy’s kids still keep in great contact with me too. When do I get to know what he answered? I will be talking to her today and would like to relay this to her. Of course she is a big believer as well. I am just dumbfounded! I almost feel like Teddy is coming through you to bring back good memories! Wow! I know you understand!

    #83624
    seek
    Member

    Dear Lainy,
    My memory is fading too and lately I am not able to concentrate on anything and I am 41 yo.
    I am assuming that I am having a selective memory, but I do remember this one.
    When the doctors told Teddy that they ran out of options, Marie, your sister in law told him over the phone: ” Oh TT I love you so much, I will take a BULLET for you”
    Did I refresh your memory ???
    Now you should remember what his answer was…
    Shhh… Don’t say it because that will contradict the meaning of the unconditional family love that I was rumbling about

    محبة
    Emad

    #83623
    lainy
    Spectator

    Emad, sorry can’t say I remember that quote. You will need to explain it to an old Grandma!

    #83622
    seek
    Member

    Lainy,

    Do you remember this:
    ” TT I will take a Bullet for you”

    #83621
    marions
    Moderator

    Grieving and fear are closely connected. It is especially pronounced when someone genetically linked to us has succumbed to this cancer and our healing process has not yet completed. And, that takes time and is very individual. But, I believe that once we move through the emotional ups and downs caused by the loss of our loved ones, fear diminishes as well.

    We must also try to focus on the advances being made in the treatment of this disease. I expect that in 10 years it will look very different from the way it is now. Personalized medicine, targeted drugs, immunotherapy all will have a great impact on how patients conquer diseases including this cancer.

    Ultimately, a positive attitude towards life detracts us and we spend less time worrying about things that may or may not happen. Be kind to yourself; it takes time to get there.
    Hugs,
    Marion

    #83620
    lainy
    Spectator

    Dear Emad, love your latest posts. Let’s see….SIL…does that mean my Sister-in-Law? TT is what she called Teddy but not sure what bullet means unless it was his days in Korea. I could be way off base so correct me if I am wrong! NO APOLOGY NEEDED for what you write as we all understand and you are not harsh!

    #83619
    seek
    Member

    Crissie,

    I have noticed the fear and the worries that have been expressing in your posts about this cancer and the chances of us getting it in the future.
    Sadly, there in no early detection for a lot of cancers more so for GI cancers.On the other hand, even though, breast cancer can be genetically inherited, most other cancers are not proven to be so.

    My Mom was pretty healthy, in good shape , no major health issues, never smoked( except for the hooka in the last 3 years), drank very socially( never finished her half glass of wine) she was 69 yo but looked like she was 59 till the last two months. All she felt in the last 2 to 3 months before her diagnose was lack of sleep and less energy, which they thought it due to the little sleep, and a back back that wasn’t in her shoulder and did not reflect to the top of her rib cage.
    My brother in law, who never smoked in his life, had a beer maybe every month or two, died last year from cancer in his tonsil which is typically a cancer that is caused by smoking.
    Our neighbors lost their daughter last week, in her early 50’s, three weeks after being diagnosed with brain cancer.

    What I am trying to say, Suzy and Crissie, you cannot live in fear of something you don’t have any control over. Actually the stress that you have might cause you some other health issues.

    On the other hand, me personally I want to think loud:
    ” I WISH IT WAS ME AND NOT ANY OF MY FAMILY”
    This is the kind of love my Angel Mom planted in my heart.

    Lainy, does that ring a bell??? SIL? TT? Bullet?

    To whom got the message, sorry if I offended you with my harshness…

    Emad

    #83618
    mbachini
    Moderator

    Suzy and Crissie,

    I understand how that fear could creep up in your mind….but please don’t let it rule your life. We have no control over how or when we will die. Don’t let this fear cripple your ability to be able to live the life you have NOW. I often worry about the possibilities of my children getting it….that is definitely one legacy I DO NOT want to leave them……but I do my best to teach them how to live each day to the fullest. They have learned so much from my journey and one of the best gifts we have received as a family battling this monster is to not let fear control the time we have left. We truly do believe that each day is a gift! My prayers to you both for peace and comfort for the future…..take care!
    Melinda

    #83617
    kvolland
    Spectator

    Suzy (and Crissie) –
    You are both devastated by the loss of a loved one but please don’t let that worry about “what if” rule the rest of your life. There is very little evidence that cc is hereditary so having genetic testing may not be worth cost. I would talk over with your insurance and see what they will pay for. It may be that they would pay for liver enzymes and maybe cancer antigen testing (CEA or CA 19-9) and while none of that is 100% remember that nothing in life is guaranteed. Live life to the fullest and appreciate what you have. Be very aware of your body and what is normal for you. If you feel like things have changed then follow up with your doctor.

    KrisV

    #83616
    crissie
    Spectator

    I hear you. I am 45 and my father died from this a couple of months ago at 66. I don’t think they would give you a cancer screening. One of my dad’s nurses said to get my liver enzymes checked yearly but some people have normal enzymes then find out they have stage IV CC.

    Should I not drink at all (I like a glass a wine per day)…..should I not ever take any medications…..I don’t know. It seems like people are healthy and get this cancer. My dad smoked but he wasn’t overweight. He was on BP meds but overall looked great and had a physical every year (although I don’t think they drew a liver panel).

    I don’t know. I am having a problem coming to terms with this myself. I am just thinking at 66 I will die.

    #10303
    suzyq1481
    Member

    I recently lost my sweet mother to cc. As a surviving family member I am slightly worried that I may develop it as well. I know the disease is not supposed to be hereditary, however, since we shared a similar lifestyle and genetic makeup…

    I feel like there should be some kind of screening. Like when family members had breast cancer at a young age, doctors start testing their daughters for breast cancer at a younger age as well. I feel that I should be screened for cc, or at least have a look at my GI tract. Would it be silly for me to ask for cancer screening now? I’m in my early 30s.

    Do any other surviving family members feel this way too?

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