The Emotional Roller Coaster
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- This topic has 25 replies, 16 voices, and was last updated 14 years, 3 months ago by lainy.
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September 17, 2010 at 3:18 pm #41261lainySpectator
We have a date in March. We live in Sun Lakes, an active adult community about 20 miles South of the airport. My daughter used to live in Paradise Valley.
I almost made Cabbage Soup but T didn’t think he could drink that. No matter how small the family it is so special that you do what you are doing. Have a wonderful evening.September 17, 2010 at 2:25 pm #41260ronidinkesMemberI usually go to Arizona in march for the AAS conference, last year I stayed in Paradise Valley!
Should I go this year, we should meet for a drink and some laughs
I made all this food for my immediate family of 4! Sorta lost my mind, I passed over Rosh Hoshana, so I pepped up for this one. I took my soup out of the freezer, because I always cook too much!
Defrost the soup, it warms the soul, and chicken soup is easy to get down and makes everyone feel good…
Sending many many hugs your way!
September 17, 2010 at 2:18 pm #41259lainySpectatorAnd a Good Yom Kippur to you as well. I did Rosh Hoshana but with caring for Teddy right now I lost the umph for tonight. And he is eating so little. I do have some chicken soup in the freezer and maybe will defrost that. Wish I was coming to your house! And IF I WAS COOOKING YOU WOULD ALL BE INVITED HERE!
September 17, 2010 at 2:09 pm #41258ronidinkesMemberEven though my mother is 100 pounds now, she is one vivacious, spiritied, feisty, gregarious, stubborn, tough woman!
My mother lost her mother when she was 12 years old at sleep away camp, which is why she is so very tough….
My grandmother Riva, was diagnosed, when my mother was 2 with metastatic breast cancer, and my mother had no idea until she was 9 years old.
I only wish my mother had her mother’s fight, my grandmother fought 10 years…..and died in her early 40’s.
The Hopkins incident in a nutshel, an 84 year old woman was an inpatient on the 8th floor. Her son age 50, came up from VA to see her. The son was not happy with the progession of his mother’s recovery, and became emotionally disturbed by the diagnosis and progress.
He then pulled a gun on the physician, who was immediately brought to the OR, and then the son locked himself inside his mother’s room, shot his mother in her hospital bed, and then himself.
The physician was shot in the upper abdomen, spent the day in the OR, but he will recover, thank g-d.
I took today off, to cook the jewish holiday, table set, chicken cooked, soup warming, potato pudding done, noodle kugel done, fresh fruit cut, wine, cookies, brownies, shabbot candles and the kitchen is cleaned! SO proud of myself.
went to acupuncture yesterday felt much better and calmer afterwords, being forced to rest and not move or think for 30 minutes reallly centers you!
Spoke with my mother last night, after acupuncture and 2 – clonopin, much better conversation.
My whole family could be a TV sit-com!
Everyone have a great friday!
September 17, 2010 at 1:36 am #41257lainySpectatorHello Ronidinkes and welcome to our wonderful family. I must say your description of your mother and how she talkes to you could be a TV sitcom if it wasn’t CC that was the culprit. Got to love NY mothers!
My husband had a Whipple 5 years ago and he is 78 now. It is the largest surgery to the human body and if Mom got through that, well perhaps she will change her mind about the treatments as you move along. The doctor will probably let her know the decision is hers to which she may bend a little. Other than that I can only second the things that Marion posted. Feel free to come and vent, inform or just to say hello as that is why we are all here. Good luck on Monday.September 17, 2010 at 12:03 am #41256marionsModeratorRoni….Dr. Gassan Albo-Alfa is a very kind and knowledgeable physician and I can assure you that he will be honest and forthright in his assessment of your Mom’s disease. I realize that the appointment is not with him personally however, if Dr. Goldberg works closely with him then I would assume that there will be communication between the two physicians.
I just heard about the shooting myself and still don’t quite know what happened. I suppose, more details will emerge. I am glad to hear that you are safe and I hope the same is true for anyone else working at this great institution.
Hang in there, Roni. Many emotions will surface, but everything will fall into place.
Good night, Roni.
Best wishes,
MarionSeptember 16, 2010 at 11:22 pm #41255ronidinkesMemberThanks Marion,
Thanks for listening to me rant….She has an appt. monday at memorial sloan kettering with dr. zoe goldberg who works closely with dr. ghassan abou-alfa who is conducting a clinical research trial there. Gemcitabine & cisplatin plus sorafenib.
My conversation with my mother did not go well this morning, and I feel like I am talking to a wall.
I begged her to go to her appt. monday with an open mind, and realize this may not be the end, to which I was scolded with “Roni, I will die of this disease and you need to learn to cope with that reality”
To which I took an ativan and went about my day and attended to my patients.
I work at hopkins, so after the shooting which shocked everyone, I called her, told her I was alright, she said, why would’nt you be alright, i said you did not hear about the shooting because you are so wrapped up right now, you need to open your eyes and LIVE because right now you are alive!
Needless to say she is still angry with me. She says i cannot force her to do anything with her body.
My brother is taking her to the chemo/radiation consultation on monday.
I also left word for Dr. Goldberg to call Dr. Abou-Alfa after her appt. to see if she is a candidate for the clinical trial. i can only do so much.
I took 30 minutes today to myself and did acupunture because I feel like I am losing my mind. Too much, too fast. not to mention i turn 40… 10-15, and am totally not excited about that.
got two kiddo to tend to, stay in touch, my email is ronidinkes@yahoo.com or rdinkes@jhmi.edu
good-night
-rSeptember 16, 2010 at 9:43 pm #41254marionsModeratorHello ronidike….I welcome you to our site and am sorry for the reasons of finding us. Your mom’s situation is like many in that the disease progresses without any noticeable symptoms. When the final diagnoses confirm it to be bile duct cancer often times, this cancer has progressed significantly. I also can understand your Mom’s reluctance of wanting to have her dignity preserved however; I do believe that it would be advisable to gather as much information possible in order to make an informed decision. Then of course, the support of the family becomes of utmost importance to her. Have you seeked out several other professional opinions? Have you spoken with an interventional radiologist? You might want to gather all of your mom’s medical records including, blood tests, physician’s reports, CT scan and forward those physicians “very” familiar with this cancer. Please, let us know if we can be of any help with you. The members on this site are the most gracious and caring individuals and will be there to help and guide you along.
All my best wishes,
MarionSeptember 16, 2010 at 9:03 pm #41253kentuckyjackMemberRick:
Thank you for sharing with all of us–regardless of the cause, it is what lies ahead for all of us at the appointed time. Debbie is blessed by your loving support now. God bless you both as you go through this together.
-Tom
September 16, 2010 at 8:53 pm #41252devoncatSpectatorRick,
Warmest thoughts of love, peace and compassion to you, Debbie and your children. There are no words, but know you are not alone.Kris
September 16, 2010 at 7:08 pm #41251ronidinkesMemberI am new to this website, my mother age 65, had a whipple 8-1, diagnosed with cholangiocarcinoma stage 4, 5 days later.
It all started July 15, with itching and jaundice, I am in the stages of shock, and anger
My mother is at this time is not willing to try chemo if she will be very ill, she is a strong new yorker who believes in dying with her dignity.
This is very hard for me, because I want her try anything and everything she can to beat this disease, but I have to respect her wishes to do what she wants with her body.
I am scared of losing my mother, my biggest cheerleader, my biggest supporter, and I a feel for my 2 children age 10 and 12 who adore her. I just cannot imagine not picking up phone and hearing her voice.
Thank you for listening.
Seabee, my thoughts and prayers go out to you and your family. Sending many hugs your ways.
September 16, 2010 at 6:25 pm #41250jennifersMemberRick, you and your family are in my thoughts and prayers – I am so sorry for what you are all going through right now. I hope you can feel the love of us all surround you, your beautiful wife, and your children…
Jen
September 16, 2010 at 6:13 pm #4124932coupeSpectatorSeabee,
There are no words… Please know that you, Debbie and your family are in my prayers.Grace and Peace,
bobSeptember 16, 2010 at 1:48 am #41248mlepp0416SpectatorSeabee and Debbie:
Our thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. May the Lord watch over all of you.
Go with God.
Margaret and Tom
September 16, 2010 at 1:39 am #41247lainySpectatorTo Seabee & Debbie, while my prayers and thought are still sailing your way, I have a poem I have not posted for a while and I hope this helps a little:
If I should be the first to go,
And leave you alone, my Dear,
Let not your heart be lonely,
Nor in your eyes a tear.Grieve not for me, my Darling,
I -
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