tough day
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- This topic has 15 replies, 11 voices, and was last updated 13 years ago by lainy.
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December 2, 2011 at 4:40 pm #54981lainySpectator
Hy Byron, I think like you (scary) but I have always told my kids, “without some bad you will never appreciate the good”. I am sure someone else said it first but now I own it!!!!!!!!!!!!
December 2, 2011 at 3:52 pm #54980mustangmortSpectator“devastated”, bless your heart. My heart breaks when I see those in pain. I’ve always just been a “big ole’ softy”. My prayers are with you and your family. I am a firm believer that our lives on earth were never meant to be free of pain and suffering. Part of our earth experience is about learning what pain and suffering is all about and what we can learn from it. Do we push ahead and grow with these experiences? Do they make us stronger people? That is the purpose, then, when all is done, we will be better stronger people. It is so hard to see our loved ones struggling. Just keep your chin up and think of how strong you and your children are going to be from this. In a weird sort of way, consider it a life blessing. Eventually, many with cc will pass and be free of pain and reside in a much better place while others who loved them will remain and be so much the stronger.
Again, my prayers and thoughts are with you and you kids.
December 1, 2011 at 8:50 pm #54979lainySpectatorThanks, Maria. Everything I write is based on only the truth, I don’t sugar coat. It was awesome. I have decided when my daughter and I feel better (we both have some tummy issues) we are going to see a Medium here in Phoenix! We are so excited to see if we have any messages. I will be sure to let everyone know. He comes highly recommended! Hope you are feeling good!!! I love your attitude!
December 1, 2011 at 8:05 pm #54978mariaSpectatorLainy, that´s so beautiful! Made me cry. We are all going to leave this world, sooner or later. This was such a wonderful way!
MariaDecember 1, 2011 at 12:04 pm #54977lainySpectatorDear Adam, I am so very sorry about your Mom and yes she is in a more Peaceful place. No two people are alike and each has there own “passing” story. I believe when they are ready they take the journey and that they really decide the time. I had in home Hospice for my husband and the last 4 days took him to a Hospice Facility. On his last day I must say it was the most awesome experience I have ever been priviledged to witness. He lay in bed for about 6 hours with his eyes open but never even blinking and as his passage started he was reaching out to people “greeting” them. He would stretch out his arms, enfold the people in a huge bear hug and kiss them as we saw him purse his lips for a big pucker. It was totally unbelievable. He only mentioned one name and that was, “Oh Mama”. I kept telling him to go to his peace and that i would be OK. Once he held up a hand to stop me an other time he actually took his fingers and plugged his ears! He was not ready. My daughter called the 2 Grandsons (teens) and told them that Papa was Passing and they were there in 15 minutes. They stood at the bed and she said to Papa, “Papa, Brandon and Kyle are here”. In 3 minutes he Passed. That is what he was waiting for. One more awesome happening. Right after he passed his whole face looked like it was glowing and became so much younger looking. He loooked like the healthiest person in the world. Our Heros have worked hard for their Peace.
December 1, 2011 at 7:08 am #54976mechwarriorSpectatorDe3ar Devestated,
My Mother was diagnosed with CC on Aug 15th 2011. After 2 intestinal stents in the colon and duodenom and a liver drain and a round of chemo.. mom passed away 10 days ago on Nov 20 2011.
The only thing I can tell you sincerely is to spend as much time as you can with him right now while he’s still conscious and able to talk back and communicate. Have the kids spend time with him. Don’t be shy to make it seem like you won’t be able to spend time again because in all honesty you wont.
We tried all kinds of different things including eastern medicine and fruits etc etc.. but truth is that it’s just God’s way of taking someone back to Himself. Simple as that.
The last week of her life she was in a semi comatic state where she was on fentenyl 40 micrograms per 24 hours along with anti nausea meds. That last week we could not communicate except for small stents here and there.
Legs will start to swell with water as the kidney and liver slow down.
Just be aware that Dr’s told us she would pass away by the weekend and she was alive another 2 more weeks. Dr’s cannot tell you nor should you believe them.When their time comes it will come. My mom’s kidney and liver functions were actually very normal till the last few hours she was about to pass away. It’s all in God’s Hands. The only thing that is sure is when he starts going into another world and talking about people and things that you’re unaware of then know the time is days away.
During the last few hours she started breathing very heavy and very rapid then would stop and then breath heavy and rapid again.. almost as though shes normal. It’s a roller coaster.
Just spend every moment you can with him at the hospital. Out of 9 brothers.. 4 of us spent the last entire week of her life with her 24 hours a day in the hospice acute hospital and myself and other 2 brothers were there for her for entire month in the acute hospital and at home before that.
God I miss my mom but after seeing so much pain she endured.. I miss her but I’m happy she isnt in pain anymore. Let me know if I can answer any of your questions.
Adam
November 28, 2011 at 6:58 pm #54975pgaskaSpectatorDear devastated.
My heart is breaking for you & your family. Cheerish every minute! I lost my Mom 2 months yesterday to CC. She got diagnosed in July. Time is precious. I spent every evening with my Mom when she got diagnosed. We are a close family, but this has only made a stronger family bond even more. God bless you and your family. Praying for a cure every day.
PamNovember 26, 2011 at 5:12 am #54974pamelaSpectatorBless you Becky. I hope each day is a little easier for you. You were and are such a great daughter and loving person. Take care.
Love, -Pam
November 26, 2011 at 5:08 am #54973pamelaSpectatorDear devastated,
I am so sorry for you, your dear husband, and family. I don’t know what to say to make you feel better. All I can say is that my heart breaks for you and I will pray for you and your family. Love your husband every day as much as you can and make his time left as comfortable as you can for him. I wish you didn’t have to go through this. My thoughts are with you.
Love, -Pam
November 26, 2011 at 4:06 am #54972pcl1029MemberHi,Jessiesgirl,
To everything there is a season- a song sung by The Byrds.
The lyrics says it all.
And as Lainy said,”ATTITUDE IS EVERYTHING” and I agree wholeheartedly.
God bless.November 26, 2011 at 3:30 am #54971lainySpectatorDearest Jessiesgirl, You can say anything you want, I feel you are doing so well. And, you are right, love and attitude is the best RX.
November 26, 2011 at 2:11 am #54970jessiesgirl67MemberHi,
My mom was diagnosed on July 18th of this year, and passed away on November 17th. The final weeks/month were such a rapid decline, but it gave all of us time to say goodbye. We talked about death and dying, we talked about heaven, and we talked about what we would do when she was gone. What I learned, and I hope this doesn’t upset you, is that: it’s going to happen. You can either fight it all the way, or say everything that you can say and love all you can, and be there for every single moment. I was with my mom 24/7 for the last 2 weeks of her life. I don’t regret it for a second.
Hugs and love.
November 24, 2011 at 5:12 pm #54969dianecSpectatorDear devastated — wrap each other in your arms and cherish this time. Hospice will help take the strain off you so you can dedicate yourselves to each other. I am thinking of you.
Love, DianeNovember 24, 2011 at 6:53 am #54968marionsModeratordevastated….I am so sorry to hear of the latest developments and my heart goes out to you and your family. I don’t believe that we ever are quite prepared to comprehend devastating news, but it is our inner strengths that will continue to guide us in the time to come. Although, a painful step to take the support and help you will receive from hospice will allow for your family to treasure this so very precious time. As bittersweet the moments may be they will be imprinted in your hearts forever. Please, continue to reach out to us. We are here for you and we are in this together.
All my love,
MarionNovember 23, 2011 at 11:18 pm #54967lainySpectatorI am so very sorry to hear this and my heart is breaking for you. So young, again! Please try to gather all your strength and make a Thanksgiving to remember. At this time last year I did the same and it was Dec. 6th that Teddy passed.I was so happy I got through the Thanksgiving. Hospice is great and quick. Your husband will be so much more comfortable. I have posted lately a few times that I put their hospital bed in the living room so Teddy could be a part of everything along with his huge TV. I also had a walker and oxygen as oxygen helped his breathing and discomfort a little along with all the meds that were needed. As far as what to do continue as you would so you can make a few more loving memories. Say the things that need to be said and of course show huge amounts of love. I will say a special prayer tomorrow for your family. Sending love your way.
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