Worst case….help!
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Hi Tstewart,
I truly am sorry that you and your family are facing this. I am sure that mom’s chemo will go well. I understand your concerns and worrying about the future. I did the same. My mother also suffered from anxiety/depression and we thought that she would be unable to hear, understand and cope with any further bad news if the cancer spread, etc. However, this was NOT the case AT ALL. My siblings and I all discussed the fact that mom just could not handle any more bad news. But, she did, and she handled it with true dignity. We did request that the doctor inform us first of any changes in mom’s condition, and, with my mom’s permission, that is what he did. The doctor truly sees this disease every day and I thought that he would be numb to the news and discussing it but, he had such compassion and gave her such hope. Talk to the doctor and discuss your concerns. This will put your mind at ease. You will be surprised at how much your mother can handle. We all were with our mom. Even with depression she will fight this dreaded disease! I will pray for you and your family.LoveMyMom
I am sorry that you are having to go through all of this right now, I know it’s not easy to do and went through all the same with my dad. I agree with what the others are saying in that I think you are maybe looking too far ahead right now and thats a lot of what if’s there. Try and deal with the present and stay positive as your mum will need you beside her for this fight.
And Kris makes a great point that in that chemo is not the only treatment out there. My dad never had chemo, he had photo dyanamic therapy.
My best wishes to you and your family.
Gavin
I am so sorry that you are having to go through this battle. How lucky your mom is to have you on her team. I completely understand your concerns. My mom fought cc for 3 years. She passed away this past September. A few weeks before she was passed while she was in the hospital a doctor stopped me in the hall and told me that she only had a few weeks-months to live, I was in total shock. I had convinced myself that she would beat it this time too, and so did she. I asked the dr not to tell her what he had told me. I too was afraid that it would break her spirit and she would not have the drive to fight like she had been. They honored my wishes and didn’t tell her. I feel good about my decision. Like the others have said, try and not jump too far ahead ( I know, much easier said than done!!!!), but if you feel comfortable, talk to your mom’s drs and tell them your feelings too. You are on this journey also.
Big hugs!
AmyI got that dreaded news after chemo. What did they say? Time to start a different regime. Got the same bad news after my second regime. What did they say? Time to try something else.
Chemo isnt the only option. As long as you have willing doctors and are in relative good health and depending on tumor size and placement, there are other options if chemo fails.
Kris
I am so sorry that you are going through all of those things in your mind. I think that you should focus on the present. But to answer your question if the doctors feel that there is nothing more that they can do then they will tell your mom that. She has a right to know. I do think that you are jumping ahead though. She might respond well to treatment, you should try to focus on that.
I think it best not to jump so far ahead but focus on what is happening now.You can help your mum as she undergoes chemo and most importantly if she has suffered with depression,make sure she is getting treatment for that concurrently-counselling,medication etc.Good luck Janet
Dear Toniann….. I certainly can understand your apprehension about the upcoming treatments which are supposed to help your Mom by stalling the growth of this cancer. And, for the scans to confirm the positive response. Understandably, it is difficult however, this is how your Mom wants to fight her disease and she will need all the positivity in the world to help her through this. Many people have responded favorably and I don’t see any reason why your Mom could not also be part of this group.
I so well understand your fears. But, this is all about living.
Hang in there. You have been an incredible support to your Mom and this board will continue to support you all the way.
Best of all wishes,
MarionOk, mom starts her chemo tomorrow. I am trying to stay positive as she is young, in relatively good health besides this and focused and determined to beat this. Of course shes scared as we alll are.
My question is she is scheduled for 6 cycles of chemo and then a scan to see if anything changed. My question is what if its bad news, what if the tumors grow, and there is nothing more the doctors can do??? Will the doctor walk in that room and tell us that my mother is going to die?? Can we stop him from doing that?? My mother has suffered from clinical depression her whole life and for her to be told something like that would most likely result in her not dying with dignity but dying despair . I cant see her go like that and neither can the rest of my family.
Has anyone else done this?? Im hoping for the best and even a few months of things going well for her but I just know want her to ever think its over. That alone would kill her. Thanks
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