marvinjake1
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Thank-you for your replies. My dad has a DNR. The doctors have said that the stents will block over and over again. At first when the doctors talked about not trying to open him back up I couldn’t understand why, but there is a man in his room that is being fed through a tube. Cannot get out of bed. Is sedated continuously, because he tries to pull out all of the IVs and does not really talk in the rare chance that he is awake. My dad was weak and struggling with the Parkinsons. He has a syndrome called Shy-Dragers with the parkinson’s. His neurologist said there was nothing they could do for the shy- Dragers. It disables him even more than the parkinson’s does. I could not stand to think of him laying there in that home like that. He would not want that. It’s the selfish part of me that would like to keep him here. He would not really be living. Sometimes I feel like screaming. This can be over whelming. I’m sure you understand. I try everyday to be positive, it’s just so hard. It’s like waiting for that call to come and hoping to get there in time. I’ve went on and on. I’m sorry for the loss of your husband Lainy. I would like my mother to be able to talk to someone who has went through this. I’m sure it would help her so much. His shoulder does really hurt him. He has alot of arthritis in it also. We don’t really know where or if the cancer has spread to other places. He has been complaining with the side where the cancer is. The nurses have him on pain meds regularly. He gets stronger meds when he has a really bad day. The neurologist said from the beginning that he was to weak for chemo or radiation. I pray everyday day that he dies in his sleep. Hospice has been so good with my dad and mom. Thank god for them. Thank you for reading my post. It helps to know we are not alone. I hate to think of other families having to go through this. Thank you for caring.
SusanI’m not sure where to start. My dad is dying from cc. For about two years his MD said he had alzheimers. He steadily got worse. Falling all the time. He is 77. It was devastating for my mother. She is 75. He had little things going on all the time. His doctor said it was the alzheimers. Finally after one of his trips to the hospital, the therapist came.{a new one}. She suggested that he be tested for parkinson’s. He was diagnosed in Feb. 2010. It was parkinsons. By July his falling was worse, would not use a walker. He fell and dislocated his right shoulder twice. My brothers and sisters talked to my mother. She agreed , after she had spent 2 years trying to take care of him , my dad was put into a rehab center and nursing home. This has been the hardest and heart breaking time of my life. I live 5 hours away. I take care of my 3year old granddaughter everyday. I feel terrible that I can’t be there all the time to help my mother. I guess I should have said right off that he retired from the army after 25 years of service. The VA has said this is service related. He was in Vietnam and in the Korean War. Agent Orange. The worst part came in November. My sister called me on a friday night and said he was almost orange from jaundice. They took him to the hospital and found a blockage. It turned out to be a mass. The cc. They finally got in and put metal stints in the mass to hold him open to let everything flow the way it should. He is back into a rehab and nursing home now. Pallative care. Hospice has started. Nothing is going to be done when the metal stints block back up. We have been told that he will jaundice again and everything will shut down. I am so scared. I don’t know what will exactly happen. The dread weighs on me everyday. I worry about my mother. She has never been alone before. My dad has always been such a strong man. This has stripped all of his dignity away. He can’t walk or go to the bathroom on his own. Mom has to feed him. When they say everything will shut down, I don’t understand what will happen first. I wish we knew more about this cancer. When I see him I can’t help but say over and over again I Love You. The one good thing about all of this is that he is a Christian. My mother is also and holding on to God. They have been married for 55 years. I’m just scared and angry sometimes that he fought for our country and it is actually killing him.
