Jules, hope can be an elusive thing in this battle with all the gloomy predictions. I wish I could say something that could help but all I have to offer are the prayers of many. Please know you are not alone in this battle.
I am sorry to read about Frank – please know you and he will be in my prayers. I’m not sure what to suggest as far as comfort other than make sure you are keeping up in the pain with meds. April had a drain tube after surgery but that was removed and never replaced. She also made a decision pretty early on to not take any chemo drugs. I told her then and continue to stand by that decision which was right for her. She didn’t eat much the last couple of months and really food lost its appeal after her surgery in July (this from someone who used to plan vacations around good food)!
I wish I could be of more help. If you have questions about the pain meds I’d be happy to run through all that we did there. Or feel free to ask any other questions and I’ll do my best to answer them if I can.