Does anyone dare answer this question. Honestly? Sensitive Question.
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July 30, 2013 at 2:22 am #73959moneilSpectator
Thank you, Kris! I want you to know that I did tell her and you gave her hope and inspiration! I so admire your spirit and love your attitude. I will be thinking about you as my mom and I embark upon this tumultuous journey. Please keep me posted on how you are doing.
Michelle
July 29, 2013 at 9:53 pm #73958kris00jSpectatorTell your mom I’ve had mets to my lymph nodes since Feb. 2011. And I’m not giving up! Some chemos work great on certain mutations. You just have to figure out which one works! And it can be tough, physically and emotionally. But I for one am not going down without a fight! I still feel great: can’t believe I’ve been told I’m inoperable and “very sick”!! And I won’t stop living…
Different radiations work, too, depending on where the tumor(s) and nodes are. I had stereotactic. Others have had y-trium(?). If she can believe it will help, that’s 1/2 the battle.
I have accepted the fact that I will die WITH cancer. I no longer accept that I will die FROM cancer.July 29, 2013 at 7:46 pm #73957moneilSpectatorHi Dorien and all – I’m new to this site, but I am soooo happy that I stumbled upon this thread! Thank you for posting this question and for all of you who answered. I, too, have been looking everywhere for answers to this exact question, but haven’t been able to find anything. My mom, who is 62 was just diagnosed with CC – we weren’t told the stage, only that surgery is not an option because the cancer has spread to the regional lymph nodes. The surgeon at Henry Ford offered us this explanation – once it has hit the lymph nodes, there is no survival benefit in having surgery. She is seeking a second opinion at Johns Hopkins. I think my mom feels like this is a losing battle, and therefore, is afraid to try chemo and/or radiation. Honestly, I’ve been losing hope as well. I just don’t know how to come to a place of acceptance of losing my mom! I’m an only child and have always been so close to both of my parents. I have a 3 year old daughter who is just so in love with her grandma and just thinking that she won’t be able to have a life with her is heartbreaking to me. My mom has always been healthy and strong – she still is and you would never know she has cancer – maybe this makes it even more unbelievable to me. Anyways, I just really wanted to thank you, Dorien, for posting this question – and thank all of you who responded.
July 28, 2013 at 3:46 pm #73956lainySpectatorHi Randi, I am so glad you went back to ‘school’. Indeed this is an excellent perspective! Thank you!
July 28, 2013 at 3:01 pm #73955RandiSpectatorHi all,
Sorry I am a little late to this post, been a busy week.
I wanted to add another perspective to this question of “terminal” and what that means.
I am taking a class where one of the topics we are covering is HIV/AIDS. Last class I learned that if given Antiviral drugs a person with HIV can expect another 35 years of life!! It’s doesn’t “cure” them but isn’t that amazing in such a short period of time for the disease and research they have extended people’s life by 35 years!
When I heard that I thought about CC and the research that is supported by this foundation and others. We can be there too.
What people have shared in this post (and on this board in general) is that some can “live” with CC, have wonderful fulfilling lives.
Remember, those people given an additional 35 years could also be hit by a car tomorrow, as we all can be. So life is what we live in the moment we are in, it’s not in the future nor is it in the past.
Oh and Dorian. Your question is not one that hasn’t haunted others. Thank you for posting.
July 26, 2013 at 10:26 pm #73954kris00jSpectatorHOPE is what keeps me going… That and FAITH!
July 26, 2013 at 9:12 pm #73953thebompie4MemberThanks for the update Kris!
I appreciate hearing the “short version” of your story…
again…it is a story that fills me with HOPE!HOPE is a good thing!
July 26, 2013 at 6:39 pm #73952betzeegirlSpectatorHi there,
Check out Laura York’s blog…http://thecancerassassin.blogspot.com/
She was dx with stage 4 in 2010 and is a real fighter –her story has really encouraged me (my husband dx w stage 4 last april)July 26, 2013 at 10:18 am #73951tiff1496MemberYes!!
A person can be stage 4 without mets outside of the liver. I was
Stage 4 because of the number and placement of my liver tumors. No way i would of got surgery if it had spread outside the liver.
Dr. Javle said 5 years of clean scans, and he will call me cancer free. Until then,
It’s remission.July 26, 2013 at 6:43 am #73950kris00jSpectatorHi, sorry I didn’t respond earlier but I was working then singing in a karaoke contest. (YEP!!) here’s an attempted short version of Feb 2011–present.
When I was diagnosed, there were mets to lymph nodes. With the Gem/Ox, the nodes had no more visible signs of cancer, so I was supposed to get the resection. We did a portal vein embolization to kill off the left lobe and grow the right. As this was done, my right lung was nicked, causing a pleural effusion. So the surgery had to be postponed. As we waited, new nodes blew up so the surgery was basically cancelled. On Gem/Xeloda, the tumor in the liver responded, but the nodes didn’t care that I was on chemo. They continued to flourish. After 2rounds, I was told I would never get surgery, and that I should have been really really sick. And I felt fine!
Stereotactic Radiation did a great job of stopping the treated nodes/tumor for 9 months, when it spread to another node.
That’s when I entered this trial. And all is quiet. Stable is a word I have come to accept.
I still ride, although not like I used to. I bought a scooter. But I’m thinking of getting my big motorcycle back up and running! I sing every chance I get. I have heard music is wonderful, and doing something you love releases endorphins, which fight disease. So I sing. Wherever and whenever I can!
Keep up the positive thoughts! And do whatever you can to enjoy life. That’s what I tell people. It’s my mantra.July 26, 2013 at 5:56 am #73949gavinModeratorHi Dorien,
Just wanted to echo what Lainy said about the boards here in that they are indeed open boards. Always have been and always will be. All questions, expressions, opinions are welcome and everyone has a voice. Personally I welcome all questions and the only silly questions are the ones that are not asked! Not saying that we have all of the answers all of the time, but everyone will do their best to answer always.
You said Dorien that you probably shouldn’t have asked this question. But hey, you had a question that you wanted to ask and you asked it, and for me, you did the right thing in asking it! And in doing so you now know that some of the other members had the same questions as well! Result all round I would say!
Hugs to all,
Gavin
July 26, 2013 at 4:24 am #73948heatherMemberI can here you say that word HOPE!!! Such an important word!!
July 26, 2013 at 4:06 am #73947thebompie4Memberseriously thank you everyone for being so honest.
I am taking GREAT comfort in the fact that several of you are YEARS out
with stage 4. (my husbands CC is in lungs lymphs and one main liver tumor–
did i mention that?)I really appreciate hearing that there IS hope …even possibly YEARS
of hope.To me? That is a great comfort.
I know that nothing is a guarantee or a certainty…but HOPE is a
beautiful thing.Fighting onward…
July 26, 2013 at 4:04 am #73946heatherMemberLainy I have probably made a life long friend because of this discussion board and the information and support it so special to me and my husband. I read things to him
Blessings blessings blessings!!!!
July 26, 2013 at 3:34 am #73945lainySpectatorGosh this Board is GREAT. I am overwhelmed by all of you. Dorien you asked a question you were leery about posting and look at the wonderful responses you have!!! Where else in the WORLD can you find a group like this.
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