October 18, 2015 at 11:39 am #89533RandiParticipant
Just saw this and along with everyone, I am so sad to hear about Duke’s death. What an eloquent man and what a great contributor to this site both in time and in words. We have too many of these moments when people we’ve come to cherish are gone…October 17, 2015 at 8:00 pm #89532ice-teaMember
Dear Duke’s family, I read about Duke’s passing away earlier but could not find enough strength to sign in and write something – news about death upset me more now than it used to – 5 months ago I lost my dad, he was also diagnosed with CC so I feel the pain of loss over and over again when I hear about people passing away. Duke was a great person, I knew that, even if I knew him for short and just online. He will remain as a fighter, a hero, a role model for so many people on this site. Being severely ill himself, he managed to comfort me about my father’s death, he always found the right words, had a great sense of humour and compassion. My deepest condolences to you all. I know what loss and pain is…It feels like a part of your heart dies and you realise it is for good…It won’t change, it hurts a lot and it makes one extremely sad. Maybe the pain will calm a bit donw with time but it burns when it is fresh.
Dear people will always remain in our thoughts, talks, memories…They are with us and will be as long as our hearts will beat. I thought and thought about our lives and came to a frightening conclusion that the only permanent and steady thing in our life is change. Some changes are painful yet inevitable…Rest in peace, Duke, I will never forget you as some people, even if known for short, can never be forgotten as they were strong, bright, smart and unique.September 30, 2015 at 6:19 pm #89531math-majorParticipant
Thanks again everyoneSeptember 27, 2015 at 8:02 pm #89530middlesister1Moderator
Hi- Me again- I posted below on the obituary website since I’m not sure if/when Duke’s family will come here, but decided to share here as well. Suggestion – I know Julie (Iowas girl) posted already, but maybe it would make Aimee and kids feel comfort to see the outpouring of love and how many people Duke touched here. if they also post directly on the funeral home website.
Dear Aimee and Family,.
I’m another one of the many who never had the opportunity to meet Chuck,but knew him through cholangiocarcinoma.org. Nothing I can write can start to convey how many people he touched, and will continue to, who are patients or caregivers for CC. “Duke” brought something special to our group. He made us laugh, cry, feel, and be informed,
He told us to look at every day as a miracle and a treasure. And, did I say he made us laugh?
“Really – not having to shave my legs? Be still my fevered heart! Never considered that one. Will I be a trend-setter on the beach or what?”
His love for family was so evident and gave even those of us who were not patients words of wisdom and love:
“You and your husband are best friends and lovers. Grab that and hang on for all you are worth. At the end of the day, after your glass of wine, it’s just the two of you and God.”
Thank you for sharing him with us. I know his spirit and love will live on through your family, but he will also live on in the hearts of so many others he has touched.
My heartfelt condolences are with you,
CatherineSeptember 27, 2015 at 7:28 pm #89529middlesister1Moderator
Thank you Marion. A tremendous loss to our family, but I will try and focus on how one person was able to give so much to so many.
I hope Duke’s family at some time in the future visits here and looks back on his posts that informed, consoled, and gave hope to so many. And, he reminded us to live, love and laugh. and treasure each day
Love to all,
CatherineSeptember 27, 2015 at 1:50 pm #89528iowagirlMember
Farewell Duke..until we meet again.
Julie T.September 27, 2015 at 12:51 pm #89527gavinModerator
Thanks so much for posting this Marion.
So very sorry to hear this news of Duke’s passing, horrible. Even though we expected it and knew this was coming it is a horrible day just as it is when we lose anyone from our family.
To Aimee and Duke’s family, please know that my thoughts are with you all right now and please accept my sincere condolences. Duke was a true gent, a gem and he will be sorely missed by so many, many people. So keen to help others in their fight as well and at the same time share a joke with us all and bring a smile to many faces worldwide. He will be sorely missed and never forgotten.
And yes Marion, we so will carry out Duke’s wishes with his so very generous donation to the Foundation by purchasing and publishing the articles that we cannot currently do so that will be of great help to so many people here.
My thoughts are with Aimee and Duke’s family right now.
Much love and Hugs to all,
GavinSeptember 26, 2015 at 2:37 pm #89526lainyParticipant
To My Dearest CUZ Family, I am so very sorry for Duke’s relocation but I know he has already met with some of the greatest people ever and I know he will still be watching over everyone especially his family. I have never “met” a man so eloquent, dignified and caring. Aimee and family how Blessed you were to have him for so many years. Please accept my humble condolences.
Death is nothing at all. It does not count.
I have only slipped away into the next room. Nothing has happened.
Everything remains exactly as it was. I am I, and you are you,
and the old life that we lived so fondly together is untouched, unchanged.
Whatever we were to each other, we are still.
Call me by the old familiar name. Speak of me in the easy way which you always used.
Put no difference into your tone. Wear no air of solemnity or sorrow.
Laugh as we always laughed at the little jokes that we enjoyed together.
Play, smile, think of me, pray for me.
Let my name be ever the household word that it always was.
Let it be spoken without an effort, without the ghost of a shadow upon it.
Life means all that it ever meant. It is the same as it ever was.
There is absolute and unbroken continuity. What is this death but a negligible accident?
Why should I be out of mind because I am out of sight?
I am but waiting for you, for an interval, somewhere very near, just round the corner.
All is well. Nothing is hurt; nothing is lost. One brief moment and all will be as it was before. How we shall laugh at the trouble of parting when we meet again!
By Henry Scott HollandSeptember 26, 2015 at 1:02 pm #89525darlaParticipant
Thanks for posting this Marion.
It is with great sadness that I read this and our dear friend Duke’s obituary. Although I am happy for him that he has been released from the pain and suffering of this terrible disease.
To Aimee, his family and all who loved him you have my deepest sympathy. He made a great impact here and was loved and cared about by all who were touched by his wit and wisdom. He will be watching over you now. Keep him with you forever in your hearts and memories. You are all in my thoughts & prayers at this sad and trying time.
He is now soaring with the angels. Straight on ’til morning.
Love & Hugs,
DarlaSeptember 26, 2015 at 4:41 am #89524marionsModerator
With a heavy heart we recall Duke’s message to our community:
“Of course there is something to be said about ending at the beginning,
I was feeling better and wanted to see what more testing might show. But then I got worse. I realized it was a shadow game and decided to end it, Aimee and I agreed that it’s time to stop fighting and accept relocation with dignity. This, folks, is what quality of life is all about.
To all you caregivers, I thank you on behalf of your patients. Take strength in all you have accomplished. This site will continue to provide you help. To patients, Sometimes you don’t know what you’ve been given until you’ve looked back, Keep up the fight.
Rolling Stones : “You can’t always get what you want but if you try sometimes well you might find you get what you need”
Love to all
To honor his wishes, we will make sure to purchase and publish research studies otherwise not available to the public.
Let’s hold each other tight in memory of our friend and mentor. Duke, forever in our hearts.
Love and hugs,
MarionAugust 29, 2015 at 12:36 pm #89523herculesModerator
Oh Duke, farewells are what I struggle with most, I hope you can make as big a difference on the other side as you have here, I am sure you will and I will see you there, I hope you have kept some strength for yourself as you have given so much to so many, Peace, PatAugust 29, 2015 at 6:04 am #89522ice-teaMember
Dear Duke, we are all guests on this earth, sooner or later we’ll all relocate, no living being will avoid it. Of course, it always seems it happens too soon. I get very sad when I read stories on this site but at the same time I can’t help thanking my fate that I actually got to know wonderful, supportive people here. My dad’s journey with cholangiocarcinoma was very short and he died because of complications after his operations and I’ll never forget your words to remember that meadow and my daddy walking on it looking happy like in my dream. You, fighting the same evil as him, kept supporting me and so many people on this site, that’s what strong spirit, bravery, kindness are to me. In my eyes (not only in mine I guess) you’re a hero.August 27, 2015 at 6:28 pm #89521sherriMember
I wanted to thank you for always being there for me and answering my post with positive thoughts to me. You made me see it has to rain sometimes before the sunshine. You are one of those very rare finds that is truly kind, human and always putting others a head of you. I am praying for you and your family that peace and comfort are with all of you.
You will be so missed but quality of life is the most imporant at this stage.
SherriAugust 27, 2015 at 4:56 pm #89520debnorcalModerator
I haven’t actually communicated with you directly, but I want to let you know that you have helped me so much nonetheless. When my husband was diagnosed in May, 2014 and I found this board and your posts. I have read many of your posts. These posts have provided me with much needed information and inspiration. I am grateful for your incredible generosity in sharing all that you have for the benefit of others during a time of personal challenge. You really do set the standard for how to navigate this disease – with accurate information, humor and dignity. Thank you. I wish you peace.
DebbieAugust 25, 2015 at 11:50 pm #89519crissieParticipant
Your courage is admirable. You are a pillar of strength to us all.
- You must be logged in to reply to this topic.