Hospice care for dad

Hello all,

Dad had a good evening this evening. I saw him for a few hours and he is tired, but he said that he has had a really good day today. He managed to eat his tea, soup, mince and some pudding and was very happy with that. I took him his beer but he didn’t drink it so he kept it in the fridge in his room for tomorrow.

We talked a bit and he was talking about mum. She wasn’t there tonight as she stayed with her sister for a while and she is real tired. I told him again that mum is in good hands and that I will do my best for her. Told him that she is eating a lot more since I am insisting that she eats more, especially at dinner time so I’m cooking more stuff for her. Hearing this put dad more at ease and he knows that I will take real good care of her.

He slept a bit, on and off and I just sat with him. he told me to go home but I said no and just sat there with him. He drifted in and out of sleep and we talked a little when he was awake. Then he would drift off again and wake and we would talk some more. I reminded him of the time we went fishing up north near Stonehaven on the rocks once when I was about 12. We didn’t notice the tide creeping in and nearly got stranded on some rocks. We had to grab all our gear and take a run and jump and dad got his foot stuck in the sand and mud when he landed and had to leave his boot behind him in order to escape the incoming tide! It was funny and it brought some laughs tonight and a smile to dads face. When I left him, he seemed quite contented and had a smile on his face. So a good end to what was a good day, and one that most definitely will be treasured for ever.

Thank you all.

Gavin

Hello everyone,

Dad had another good day today. We didn’t get out for that walk due to the rain and it was a damp dreary day, so hoping for better weather tomorrow. Tom is Tuesday so dad is hopefully going through to day care for a while in the morning. His appetite has been good again, really good. Toast and porridge for breakfast, soup, mince and rice for dinner and a sandwich for his tea. Now that is a heap of food compared to last week! And again, he is keeping pretty much it all down, so hoping for more of the same tomorrow.

I spoke with the head doctor for hospice today and we had a long chat. He also had a good man to man talk with dad about everything in the morning before we came up. He thinks dad has about a week or so to go now, which is longer than what we thought at the weekend so that is something to be grateful for. He is very impressed at the way dad has repsonded to the new medication and they have added some pain meds to the driver also. They want to monitor that for another day or so and if dad keeps doing as well as he is then he can get home for a few days if he wants. They have got the sickness down to a very low level just now and it is much more manageable. He wont stop being sick, but it is nowhere near as bad as before.

They also taked about the end and dad told the doctor that he wants it to be in the hospice as he feels much more comfortable and safe there. He is very worried about mum as she wont be able to help him at home. But if he can and wants to get home for a few days then I will be there round the clock, so it is really down to dad doing what he wants. He asked my opnion, but I told him to be selfish and think of what he and only he wants. Told him that if he wants home for a bit, then I will sort the house for him and get his bed in the living room, get him a wgheelchair to get him to the bathroom and fit the new bed support so that he can sit up in bed. And someone will be in the room awake all the time with him so it can be done if dad wants it.

His pain is slightly increasing today and he has had a few shots which help him. But this is something that is worrying him about coming home, as we would have to get the nurses round to give him the injections, whereas in the hospice he gets one immediately. I guess there is no right or wrong answer here and dad should do what he feels is right for him. But as with everything to do with his CC, i will support his decision all the way.

He didn’t get much sleep last night. They offered him an injection to help if he wanted it but he said no, so he said he would take one tonight. We have just left him and he looked really tired so i am hoping he gets a better sleep tonight. We discussed the care he is getting at the hospice and it can’t be faulted at all. I think dad is about as comfortable as he possibly can be right now.

Thank you Ashley. Dad’s friend was up again today and his other 2 friends are coming up again on Thursday. These moments are to be enjoyed and we will do so for as long as we can.

Thank you all.

Gavin

Hi all,

We saw dad again last night, and he had had a good day he said. And he enjoyed seeing his friends as well and they are going up again as soon as they can. They all go back a long long way. Dad has something again to eat for his tea, maccaroni cheese which he enjoyed and this is the most he has eaten in about a few weeks. Plus he is actually wanting to eat which is also a good change.

He got a bit of pain in his stomach yesterday for which he got an injection. And when we left at night, he still loooked to be in a bit of pain although he said he wasn’t. I spoke with the nurse on the way out and told her this and she said that he should not be in pain as they have plenty of things they can do for him if he is. So dad was away to get another pain killing injection and the amount he gets is to be monitored so that they can in need be give the right amount through the driver. If he does get this in the driver, I hope that he is still able to talk as well as he did yesterday as this helped him, yesterday to have a good day. We will see what today brings.

It is raining here just now which is a shame, but hopefully it will stop later. If not, we will see if we can do it the next day. I am also going to speak with the doctor today to see if he can go through to day care tomorrow if he is up to it. If he is then it will be relatively easy to do as we can just get a chair and wheel him through, as it is only a few corridors away from his room. He said before that he would like to go if he can, even if it is just for a short time in the morning and this happens quite a bit with patients in the hospice who also go to day care each week.

Thanks Lainy, I’m glad that made your day and getting out for a walk does sound good, and I will enjoy it, as will dad. I know mum did enjoy her time with her sister and it makes a change from only having me around when she is at home. My cousin is going up to see dad today after her work and mum and dad will enjoy seeing her as well.

Thanks Katie, when we saw dad at night he was back in his bed and he said that the new mattress thing was mighty comfy indeed! I also hope the new meds work from here on in as they definitely helped dad yesterday and it is allowing him to eat some and keep his fluids down and he is drinking a lot more now.

Thanks Darla, hopefully we will have a positive and good day today. Pity it is raining though, dad has always hated the rain! The grounds of the day care and hospice are quite large and very peaceful indeed with lots of bushes and trees and stuff. They also have paths throughout and dad would go walking a bit through them from day care, so I know he would enjoy it.

Thanks Pam, we are treasuring these moments indeed and are as you say a gift. Having the private room for dad is really good as it means he is a lot more comfortable, especially when he has quite a few visitors.

As always, thank you all so much.

Gavin