My husband and Cholangiocarcinoma – The fight has ended

Thank you everyone for your wonderful posts. They all mean so much to me.

Jessiesgirl: Hang in there, it will get easier in time. Yes, there are times when the pain seems to be unbearable, but your mom would want you to live your life to the fullest, to do the very best that you can do with your life, achieve your dreams! Hold your memories of your mom close to your heart and keep her alive in your memories. She will ONLY be forgotten when no one mentions her name any more!

I’ve finally received the Life Insurance check from my employer and paid off the funeral today, now have to figure out all the medical bills and work with my employer to see if they will WAIVE the ‘new’ $2,400 deductible that they put on my individual policy AFTER meeting the $2,400 family deductible and the family $3,000 out of pocket! My complaint is that since I already met everything, just because my husband passed away and was removed from the policy, I should not be penalized because he passed away, and I feel that my employer is discriminating against ME! We’ll see what happens.

Living my NEW NORMAL!
Hugs and love to everyone.
Margaret

I have to let everyone know that the funeral for Tom was wonderful, emotional, sad, full of joy, bittersweet. There were a lot of family and friends for the Wake on Friday, and the same for Saturday for the service.

The Deacon that did the service said “When I do a funeral service and see such a large group of people in attendance such as I do today, that tells me that this man was a much loved person who touched many people during his lifetime.

Our grand daughter Kaylah, 16, (from Iowa) sang “Amazing Grace”, our daughter Brianne sang “Go rest high on that Mountain” (Vince Gill) and Tom’s fishing buddy Dennis did the Eulogy.

The Deacon and Dennis are brothers and before Dennis even spoke, Deacon Mike had to get a few ‘digs’ in for his brother with statements such as “Tom must have been a heck of guy to get a guy like my ugly brother to cry while writing the words he wanted to say” and “I have to pick on him so that he gets mad at me so he won’t cry today” and at one point said “Dennis, do I have to pinch you?”

The words that Dennis spoke for the Eulogy are as follows:

I met Tom approximately 16 years ago, you know how you meet some people and they have this smile that makes you feel like you could just hug them? Tom was one of those people. He invited me to join him at Whitefish Lake in Canada for a week of fishing. That became a yearly adventure for 14 years. Tom, I am sorry to have to say this but you were NOT the best fisherman. Marge seemed to always ‘out fish’ you. Now we pray that you are fishing up in heaven with the best fisherman of them all: Our Lord, Jesus Christ.

I pray that I may live to fish until my dying day. And when it comes to my last cast, I then most humbly pray: When in the Lord’s great landing net and peacefully sleep. That in his mercy I be judged big enough to keep. Tom was always there. If that meant driving all the way to Thunder Bay and back for a part for SOMEONE ELSE’S motor; Tom was there.

Our Lord says to Love thy neighbor as thyself. Tom showed all his neighbors love through his deeds. Look at what he did for his family and friends at White Clay Lake.

I feel Tom was the happiest when he reunited with Marge. She became his strength through these hard time. Thank you Marge.

This is a shotened Version of Lina Ellis’s (The Dash) if you have already heart it, please bear with me.

I read of a man who stood to speak at a funeral of a friend. He referred to the dates on his tombstone. He noted that first came th date of his birth 1947. Then he spoke of the followng date with tears, 2011. But he said, what mattered the most of all was the DASH between the years. For that dash represents all the time that he spent alive on earth. And now we all know what that dash is worth. I believe Tom lived that dash to the utmost as a Husband, Father, Grandfather and Friend.