November 18, 2011 at 4:44 am #53780kmemoroParticipant
I am so sorry for your loss and I know that your children will give you the strenght that you need to go on for them.
My eldest son said, when he found out about my father, his Pepa, “Look at the legacy he is leaving” as my Dad only has a short time left.
keep your memories close to you and smile when you think of something special.
KathyNovember 17, 2011 at 6:43 pm #53779pamelaParticipant
I am so sorry for your loss. I’m sure you find great comfort through your children. My daughter is suffering with this disease. I don’t know what I would do if she were gone. All I know is that I have today, and I try to make each day count. Try to make each day count for yourself and your children. Ric is watching over you all the time. Please try and take comfort in that. God bless you all and I hope each day gets easier for you.
Love, -PamNovember 17, 2011 at 5:11 pm #53778elsyr73Member
I am so sorry for your loss. Thank you for sharing your story with us. I hope that you find comfort in your children and the many wonderful memories with Ric before this horrible disease took over. My prayers are with you and your family.
God Bless you.
ElsyNovember 17, 2011 at 3:43 pm #53777darlaParticipant
I can only echo and agree with what everyone else has already said. Our journey with CC was over in 2 months time. Jim has been gone for 3 years and yes, we do go on. How, I’m still not sure, but we do. Yes it is lonely and yes I still miss him terribly. There will always be a hole in my heart that will never be completely filled, but although it does not seem likely to you right now, it does get a little easier with time.
Know that I am thinking of you and your family and share in your grief and sorrow. Keep coming back here. It really does help. We are all here to help and support you and your family in any way that we can.
Love & Hugs,
DarlaNovember 17, 2011 at 5:08 am #53776marionsModerator
Dear Deb….I am glad that you have found your way back to us. The process of moving on is extremely difficult. On this site we compare this cancer to a roller coaster. I strongly believe that grieving is not much different from that. It has been almost five years since my husband passed and although, I have gone on with my life and all the little holes in my heart have filled, it is the big hole that stayed. As time goes by though, I find myself taking more pleasure from things I had not imagined before. Our Dr. Giles (you can find him under patient support) had written something profoundly effective and clarifying. He said:November 17, 2011 at 5:07 am #53775tiapattyMember
I am sorry for your loss and your children’s loss. I read Hannah’s post, she is a very good writer and it was a touching tribute to her father and to you.
Sharing on here is a kind of unburdening so visit when you feel the need for support.
PattyNovember 17, 2011 at 4:57 am #53774dianecParticipant
Dear Debbie — I’m so sorry your precious Ric has passed. You and your family are devasted I know.
You’ve been on a long journey over the past number of years. You now have a journey of your own, and it takes a long time to realize healing is taking hold.
The members of this site are absolutely wonderful. We’re all here to support one another. Your children are also part of our community. Feel free to express your thoughts and experiences here.
With empathy and love,
DianeNovember 17, 2011 at 4:49 am #53773lainyParticipant
Dear Debbie, it’s good to hear from you again and so glad to have your update.
My husband passed last December 6th and it seems like only yesterday. I always say we learn to live our ‘new normal’. I believe we are strong and go forward as that is what our husband’s would want us to do. I am a big believer in the beyond and I feel Teddy around me all the time and know that is what got me through this year. Like you, I handled everything and I think that is part of the loss we feel. We were so busy doing and living for 2 that it is doubly hard to live as one. I never looked back to could have, would have as we made all of our decisions together and with the best of Doctors. I agree there is a huge hole in our lives but if there was not that hole, what kind of love would it have been.
For you it has only been 6 weeks and strangely it does get easier even though the hole remains. Wishing you the very best and please stay in touch.November 17, 2011 at 3:51 am #53772dabrown696Participant
Hello to everyone. It has been approx six weeks since my husband Richard passed away. It has a very, very busy time and I have not been able to really process him being gone. I still feel as if he is just away, aor at the hospital for a procedure. Our amazing daughter, Hannah posted a few weeks ago. I believe this has given her some comfort. Ric fought extremely hard for three long years. He never knew what stage he was in and didn’t care. I handled all the appointments, doctors, medicines, treatments and everything else, he took care of himself and his body. We worked so hard and for awhile there he was functioning quite well. But, unfortunately, the illness over came him and his body could no longer fight. At first, I questioned some of the decisions we made, but now believe everything Ric and I decided on regarding treatments and care were absolutely correct. We were married for 25 years and have been together for 31 total years. I cannot describe how much I miss him and what a void my life is. My nights and weekends are very hard, but having our children – Tyler, 20 and Hannah,14 around, help to make this this transition a little better. Ric has always been a fighter, and we have taught our kids to be strong and independent. I believe this will help me, in time heal. Thank you for all of your thoughts and supportOctober 15, 2011 at 3:24 am #53771peggypMember
Please accept my sincere condolences in the loss of your husband, Ric. I know you and your children must be going through a trying time. My husband John has also been fighting this battle since July ’08. It never gets any easier. I am sending many hugs and prayers your way. Take comfort in knowing that Ric is now at peace and he will always be in your hearts. PeggyPOctober 14, 2011 at 8:34 pm #53770darlaParticipant
Thanks for sharing Ric’s journey. It is a journey too many of us know so well. My thoughts and prayers go out to you and your family. Take care and stay with us. The love & support on this site is nothing but amazing.
Love & Hugs,
DarlaOctober 14, 2011 at 7:02 pm #53768cmParticipant
Thank-you for sharing your story.
I am very sorry for your loss, I hope you find comfort through your children.October 14, 2011 at 11:57 am #53769mustangmortParticipant
Debbie, indeed words cannot express the rush of feelings you have had the last 2 weeks. But I know as well as you he is in a better place, happy, pain free, and best of all, not far away.
I appreciate your story and know my love and support is with you and your children. Hugs all around.October 14, 2011 at 4:03 am #53767mnParticipant
I’m sorry for your and your families loss Debbie. This disease really stinks. I am glad you got those 3 years together and were able to do some fun things. That is all my mom hopes for, is one day to feel good enough to do something.
I’m glad you posted. I have received a tremendous amount of support on this site. As much as I hate this cancer, I see the name and logo, and I feel the support from this group.
Take care of yourself.October 14, 2011 at 4:00 am #53766lainyParticipant
Dearest Debbie, welcome to our wonderful family. Ric and you had quite a journey but I am glad that he passed peacefully. I also found it quite remarkable how at the Passing moment my husbands face looked so young so at peace! My pryaers go out to you and your family.
Letter from Heaven by Ruth Ann Mahaffey
To my dearest family some things I’d like to say
But first of all to let you know that I arrived okay,
I’m writing this from Heaven. Here I shall dwell with God above
Here, there’s no more tears of sadness. Here is just eternal love.
Please do not be unhappy because I’m out of sight
Remember that I am with you every morning, noon and night.
That day I had to leave you when my life on earth was through
God picked me up and hugged me and He said “I welcome you,
It’s good to have you back again,
you were missed while you were gone,
As for your dearest family, they’ll be here later on.
I need you here badly, you are part of my plan
There’s so much that we have to do to help our mortal man.”
God gave me a list of things that he wished for me to do
And foremost on the list was to watch and care for you
And when you lie in bed at night, the days chores put to flight
God and I are closest to you . . in the middle of the night.
When you think of my life on earth and all those loving years
Because you are only human, they are bound to bring you tears
But do not be afraid to cry, it does relieve the pain
Remember there would be no flowers, unless there was some rain.
But one thing is for certain though my life on earth is o’er
I’m closer to you now than I ever was before.
There are many rocky roads ahead of you and many hills to climb
But together we can do it by taking one day at a time.
When you’re walking down the street and you’ve got me on your mind
I’m walking in your footsteps, only half a step behind
And when it’s time for you to go . . from that body to be free
Remember you’re not going . . you’re just coming here to me.
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