Time for my experience and help

Carlos,

At my dad

Dear Carlos,

I think it’s really important to tell your mother that this disease is very, very different in different people, and some people do live for years with it. Doctors can tell you statistics, but statistics only say what happens to large groups of people. They don’t tell you what will happen to one person.

Yes, it’s a very bad disease, but some people have a much easier time than others. And there’s no reason why your mother can’t be one of them!

I agree that you should ask the doctor about the possibility of radiation treatment. It’s much easier on the body than chemotherapy, and in my case, I had very good results.

Please let us know how everything goes. We’re all thinking of you and wishing you the best.

Kristin

Hi Carlos,

Glad to hear that your mum is feeling a bit better each day and I hope she is managing to get some sleep as well. I can’t really add much to what Lainy and Marion have said regarding questions to ask, but what about asking would the chemo be given in the hospital or with tablets at home? And perhaps how long would the treatment take, how many times etc.

Sorry I cant be of more help. I hope the meeting goes well.

Best wishes to you both

Gavin

Well, I would want to know what the doctor feels the prognosis could be after chemo. Like what are the chances of the chemo really helping versus no chemo. To be straight forward, what if she had no chemo at 74 years of age. What if she did? What are the common side effects with chemo. Perhaps if you looked back through some posts here it would help you to say oh, yes, that’s what I want to ask. I am sorry to sound stupid but since Teddy didn’t have chemo not sure what I would ask. I could tell you everything about cyber knife!
I just know some of our “family” will gie you some better suggestions.

Glad to hear mom is doing better, Carlos. I don’t think there is a right or wrong protocol. I would make a list with your mom of any questions you can think of that you would like answered. Use that list so that you get everything answered that you want know. Good luck.

Hi Carlos and mom! You are so right about outside people who mean well. I got through all this as caretaker by putting up a wall to the outside world until Teddy and I were ready to let them back in. It is such an undue stress to answer to everyone when all you want to is get the best for your mom. What I did was form an e mail update list. Teddy had spent about 7 weeks in the hospital and every evening I would email everyone on his progress/what is happening. I first sent an email saying we were under a tremendous amount of stress and I would appreciate their understanding that I just can’t handle a gazillion phone calls after spending all day at the hospital. Fortunately everyone was extremely understanding. My mind was totally focused on Teddy and that really relieved a lot for me. Now with Teddy’s new spot and my recent DX after surgery, I am in my blocked mode again, at least for a bit.
P.S. in that first e mail I also described to them what he had and what was being done. One they hear what CC is all about, they kind of back off because its really too scary for them to wrap around. Just a suggestion on how to hold well meaning people at bay a little.

Dear Carlos,

Your mother doesn’t need to go outside to walk. The important thing is for her to move her body, to get her blood circulating and her muscles working agiain. She can just walk inside the house from one room to another, if that’s what she wants to do, but it’s really important to do it a little bit longer every day. She can start with just one or two minutes, and add a few minutes every day. Tell her that walking will help her feel better much faster.

Maybe you can find her some very loose clothes to wear– like a very big dress.

How old is your mother? That information might help us find more ideas for her.

You are such a good son!

Kristin