darla

I agree that those of us in favor of health care reform have all been touched in one way or another by these battles and short comings. I think everyone that is pro private health insurance needs to read this. I had the opportunity to talk to someone who worked for BCBS which at one time was consider one of the best health insurers and was told much of the same as what was stated in that article along with a lot more on how they got away with not paying for things that should have been covered, etc. He, in all good conscience, could not continue working for them as these practices continued to escalate. His current employment does not generate the income he had before, but atleast he is happy and can sleep nights knowing he is not a part of all that deceit.

Darla

Thanks for resurrecting this thread. I had not seen it before & it has given me a lot to think about.

Darla

Hi Victoria,

Welcome to our group. I am sorry you are going through all of this with the loss of your Mom & now your Dad’s diagnosis of CC, but you have found the right place to come for help & support. I am hoping for the best for both you and your Dad. Please keep in touch and let us know how he is doing.

Darla

I too would like to welcome you to the site. You are in good hands here. I agree with Lainy. The heart doctor should be able to answer some of your concerns. It seems many have been told the standard 6 month prognosis, but there is no real standard here. Many have beat that and gone on a lot longer. Being realistic, some do lose the battle quickly. This cancer is very unpredictable and treats everyone differently. You need to ask a lot of questions, get many opinons and then make decisions based on that and your own feelings. Come back often as you will find that everyone here is more than willing to try to help and give guidance & support or even just listen. Please let us know how things are progressing with your Mom.

Darla

Dear Janet,

I am probably not the best one to advise you on this as I don’t feel like I am handling these things too well, but I will tell you how I feel. All of these anniversary’s are a real challenge. I think it is a very personal thing, the way we deal with them. Others are really no help as I found most just try to stay away from the subject as they don’t want to hurt your feelings or bring back sad memories (as if you aren’t thinking of it all the time anyway!). Sometimes I just feel I need to be alone and talk to Jim about how I am feeling or write in a journal. Honor his memory in my own way. Other times I want to be with others who are important to me and really do care & understand. Who are willing to talk & listen or just be there. It is hard when so many things come close together. Jim’s birthday, Father’s day, one of my son’s birthday and also my daughter-in-law’s are real close together in July and that was hard. There were also several events going on at that time last year that we miss because of what we were going through. It was pretty much when it all began for us. Sometimes I thought it would be easier to just act as if it is just another day, but believe me that is not the answer and didn’t work for me. It just made it all more evident (like the elephant in the living room that everyone ignores)!

So, I guess what I am trying to say is that you need to do what works for you and gives you the most comfort. No one ever said any of this would be easy, but why does it have to be so hard?????

I will be thinking of you as you go through these challenges & I go through mine. It really is all so very trying, but we will all get through this, together, one day at a time.

Love & Hugs,
Darla

Dear Ashlea,

I too understand and feel your pain & frustrations. I can relate to so much of what you said. I know it is not easy, but try to think of the positives more than the negatives. The letter he left for you, knowing that he is now with his grandchild and no longer suffering. You were there for him when it matter. He is still with you in your heart & in spirit.

Others do not understand, but everyone here does. We have all been there and know better than anyone else what it is like to lose a loved one to this horrible disease. We are all here for you. Come here whenever you need to & post all you want. Just venting your feelings sometimes makes a difference. Take care Ashlea.

Love & Hugs,
Darla

Karen, Thanks for sharing. You are not intruding and your “2 cents” is always welcome and appreciated. I have to agree with what both you & Pauline have said. We need to get away, but should give it some thought. No one said it would be easy, but we do have to try. There’s no getting away from the occasional tears, but there is nothing wrong with that. I do think that we are all a lot stronger than we think we are.

Pauline, I am glad that things are going a little better for you now that you are in Tuscany. It would really be great if we could some how plan to all get together some day. We are all in this together, after all, and as you said, there would be no explaining to do as we all know and understand what we are all feeling and going through.

Everyone take care.

Love & Hugs,
Darla