Response to Alla’s posting

Thank you, all.
Looks like everybody in agreement about TPN. Interesting enough, I prepared his TPN tonight and we tried to flush his Picc line – didn’t work. So tonight decision was made for me, at least for now – divine intervention? Interesting how it worked out for tonight, isn’t it?
I will talk to nurse tomorrow. Thanks, Alla

Alla, that is such a difficult question, I want to refer you back to Marion’s post on this thread of Oct 9th. I would also ask the Hospice Nurse what she thinks and put those 2 things together with seeing how he is tomorrow. I know this will be the hardest decision you have to make but there is no right or wrong. If you pushed me against the wall and demanded an answer, after going through what I did with Teddy, my own personal self would not prolong anything. Again that is my own opinion. I used to tell my kids when making a big decision to write a list of pros and cons and see which one outweighs the other. They tell me that helped in making decisions. Well, Alla, thats the best I can do. What ever you decide will be the right decision. Be strong.

All about the same. Surprisingly he was more alert today – stayed awake for about 2 hours once, talked – mostly nonsense, but would answer simple questions. Sounded mostly clear as well. Yesterday he was happy to see his son – smiled big and gave him big hug, then acknowledged me and gave me hug. Even puckered up his lips for a kiss! Of course it was all mixed with some other moments of confusion, but at least had few good moments. He later thanked his son for coming.
Now my biggest dilemma is TPN. His son and his brother think we should stop it. I’m having hard time with it. Am I prolonging his suffering? Will he ever regain clear mind?
Any input is welcome! Sincerely, Alla

Alla, that was such a heartfelt gesture. Just shows that he is aware what is happening, you will always cherish that one. This is that time when we make these moments to cherish, I still cherish many like that. I remember being in the kitchen and Teddy came ambling in without the walker. I said, “where is the walker? If you fall we will really have problems”. He answered with outstretched arms, “I just wanted to dance with you” and he started singing our song and dancing with me. Bittersweet I know but oh how those moments get us threw later. If you don’t mind I want to share a poem with you that I wrote about 1 week prior to Teddy getting his Peace.

SENSITIVE SENSITIVE

Time is growing closer, I can see it in his eyes,
Time is growing closer, but we’ll have no sad ‘goodbyes’.
Memories abound from our precious moments spent,
To God it is, I’m sending, the most “precious” package sent.

These last few months of knowing, we’ve made a honeymoon,
In my mind a vision of an eternal, beautiful afternoon.
He is still my charming Prince, who taught me how to love,
And someday we’ll be together, in Heaven up above.

I will see him riding stars, I will see him in the moon,
And someday you will see us dancing to our favorite tune.
He will touch my face so gently, like he’s known to do,
It’s not goodbye forever, with memories bad or few.

All our love, my sweet one, is ours to hold so tight,
Until once again together on a mystical, magic night,
We will be again united to celebrate our dance around the sun,
And know that our eternity together, has only just begun.

Alla, we have had 2 good remedies for hiccups on our site. Teddy had them non stop for months after his Whipple and finally a Pharmacist recommended Brioske (sp). Its like a ground alka seltzer that you dissolve in water. Teddy took it once and the hiccups left and never came back. You can get it at CVS or Walgreens and it comes in a blue bottle. He also used it to settle his stomach when needed. The other suggestion is a teaspoon of sugar. I hope his son has arrived. Be strong.

Thank you all. Marion, does it mean your husband had bleeding problem as well? Mine is still confused, sleeping a lot, lots of hiccups. Still waiting for his son to arrive. I think I’m handling second day a little better, with the help of my friend. I’ll keep you posted. Sincerely, Alla

Alla,

I am so sorry to hear of what you and your family are going through. Many of us have been through the same and know how you are feeling. I am glad to hear his son will be there to help and support you.

Many thoughts and prayers coming your way.

Take care.

Love & Hugs,
Darla

Alla, Morning, I got up early and saw your post. When is his son getting in? I am so glad that you will have him there with all of you. I hope you got some rest, yesterday was a bear for you! I will be watching for your updates and be strong!