tess
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Jan, I’ve thought about you and your Dad so many times since I joined the board back in Nov. Your correspondences helped my family through more than you know, and it breaks my heart that you too know the pain of losing your Dad to this. I am glad that it was a peaceful passing, and I know that you fought with and for your Dad all the way… so does he.
Here’s hoping our Dad’s can touch base on the other side…
I hope that you do pursue Hospice, you will continue to be in my thoughts.
Regards,
TessDear Amy, I am truly sorry for what you and your Mom are going through. You will definitely be in my prayers.
Tess
Dear Elizabeth, I too am so sorry for your loss. My heart breaks for you, in both your loss and the suddenness of it all. I’m just really sorry for what you must be going through, it is a very difficult time.
You’re in my thoughts.
Tess
Hi John and welcome! Never rule anything out… you just never know what the future holds, and cc impacts everyone differently. You will find a wonderful support group here to help with any questions that arise. The fact that the Docs are wanting to move quickly and collaborating together on a plan for you is one of the best possible scenarios. Come back and pulse the group if issues come up that you have questions on.
You’re in our thoughs.
-Tess
Hi Louise, I too am so sorry for your loss. You are in my thoughts. You’re right, life doesn’t provide us adequate time or space for the grief we need, but it is a beautiful thought that you’re able to see you parents together and to know that you’ll see them again.
Tess
Hi Elmoks, my thoughts are with you and your Mom. My Dad had the biliary cath tubing inserted. He too had that changed 3 times over a 4 mo. peroid. It didn’t go out into a bag, unless the docs wanted the bile removed (such as post infection, such that they could monitor it), otherwise it served to divert the bile. The cath did have to be flushed 2X daily. The bile was leaking back out of the tubing hole, at one point so the docs needed to insert a larger cath (he went from an 8 to a 10). The standard schedule, as Mom recalls, was to have it changed every 2-3 months. Because the bile duct was closed, the tubing went from the liver (pushed past the bile mass) & went into the intestines to keep the system functioning. The doc said that he didn’t want the bile going into a bag for any long peroids of time, asserting that the body needed it to continue to function appropriately.
Wishing you the best.
Tess
Hi Irene, my Dad too was on gemzar alone, for 4 months. It did keep the tumor from growing. Dad was not working at the time, and his level of fatigue would likely have kept him from working. But I don’t know if that fatigue was attributed to the advanced cancer or his chemo. His appetitite was rather weak and his tastebuds were effected, lemons before eating helped him cleanse his palate & better enjoy meals. He did not get sick, but had very occasional feelings of nausea. He did not lose his hair either. Strength began to resume on his off weeks of chemo.
Wishing you the best Irene.
-Tess
Hello Karldot and welcome. Your Dad’s been through a lot, but it’s tough to stop a golf lover! I would think that breakfast, lunch and a nutrition shake for dinner is a pretty good calorie consumption. My Mom use to put a couple scoops of ice cream in Dad’s nutritional shake, along with his vitamins, to get some extra calories in there. You may have to keep encouraging your Dad to try new foods too, as I found that my Dad had some odd cravings and aversions in his cc, it would be hard to tell a lot of the time what he would or wouldn’t eat.
I don’t know if your Dad is on meds for pain or discomfort or constipation, but these use to sometimes bother my Dad’s stomach too. I’d definitely bring it up at the next doc visit.
Thinking of you and your Dad,
TessHello and welcome. I am sorry for what your family is going through. It is true, second and third opinions are never a bad idea, if you can do it. When I was researching treatment options for my Dad, I was told that ‘standard’ treatment options were specific to chemo, radiation or resection (or a combo thereof). Dad’s doc told him to go home and seek out experimental treatments/clinical trials, and Dad decided that he wanted to stay close to home and not travel, thus he opted for the gemzar treatments, which he tolerated quite well.
We’re thinking of you and your Mom.
-Tess
We do certainly understand your line of questioning…. If I had a nickle for everytime I questioned if I did enough for my Dad, or if he knows that my intentions always had his best interest at heart, or if I could have done something different to make him more comfortable, etc….. I’d be looking at early retirement.
My own family had many ‘discussions’ on the topic of hospice and my Mom felt like calling them in was an invitation for death, and would not hear of it. But Dad was dying, whether we called hospice or not (which we did less than 24 hrs. before his passing- and they never made it). He would have died whether they were involved or not, it was just his time.
It’s very natural to wish you could have done more, that’s love. You made the right decisions and your Mom loves you for all you did.
Tess
Hi Amy, I am so sorry to hear your Mom is in so much pain. I use to rub lemon juice on a warm washcloth through my little guys mouth when he had thrush. It may help your Mom, if the prescription meds aren’t of interest.
You are in our prayers Amy.
Best,
TessYou and your Mom are in our thoughts, I hope they can get that temp under control & keep her comfortable.
Tess
