vincently22

Mom is resting in peace
Hello everyone! The moment which I was really scared of to see it coming had finally came. Mom passed away yesterday around 6:25 pm after about 6 months battling with cholangiocarcinoma. I’m still trying to get used to accepting the fact that mom is gone but I know the day will come. Yet, I try to be strong and will be strong ‘cuz after all, mom in heaven wouldn’t want to see being weak anyway. I’m trying to be positive. In a way, mom doesn’t have to go through the pain she was having so I’m happy for her. I’m sure she wanted to live longer too but her quality of life was bad prior to her death. Luckily all 7 of us were there before she passed away. We stood on both sides of her bed. WE also had the monks to pray for her (our tradition). After she passed away, we (children) took turn praying for her for 8 hours straight till 2:30 am in the morning. So in a way, that would make mom happy for sure to have her lovely children did that for her which is priceless. Every important things that mom and us needed to tell each other had been said and done so there was nothing left. In a way, we’re very glad and more importantly, mom was gone without any pain thanks to the pain meds that kept her sedated and pain free.
I am very glad my siblings are taking it better than I thought. At first i was very worried for my brother and all my sisters ‘cuz we all love mom to death. Who wouldnt love mom anyway being a great mom and a great person as she was. Well I should really say “is” ‘cuz mom will always live in our hearts. She’s a great role model for us to follow. Yeah, I’m very glad that my siblings aren’t as depressed (I hope they’re not hiding it). I was worried about how they were gonna deal with this but I’m glad they’re taking it better as I kept convincing them that it was better for mom that way.
As for me, I’m slowly accepting the fact that mom is gone. It’s sad to see that but that’s just human’s nature. Everyone was sent to this world for a period of time and would be taken back. After all, if everyone can live forever, we would be running out of lands to live. I’m reminiscing every single moment we had with mom. I’m kinda scared to wake up ‘cuz I would see the reality is that mom is no longer there. However, I’m bleshed to have mom as my mom. We had a great time together whether it was good/bad or happy/sad. I treasured every single moment. Also, we’re glad that we were able to go on a few road trips with mom up north to see a Chinese doctor which we believed could help mom with her cancer. It was a long road trip and it was totally worth it ‘cuz of the moment we were with mom. I’m sure in her heart, she was very very happy. She kept telling us time over time. Money wise, we’re not rich all anything but she’s very very proud to have us children like she did. She said she had alot of pride in that even some rich parents can’t get. The love from us for her is priceless and I’m glad she appreciated that and she is very proud of us.
Anyway, I dont know what else to say now but dont worry everyone. I’m staying strong and will be strong. It’s kinda hard to accept mom’s gone but eventually I will. I still have school to worry about and I know mom doesn’t want me to break down just like this. She know her son won’t be that weak. She really wanted to see me graduate and was really hoping to live till then but destiny doesn’t allow her. She’ll be seeing that in heaven and I will graduate and make her proud. Alrighty, I wish everyone a good day! i will check back later and I really really appreciate everyone’s caring and praying for mom and our family. This is one of the best forums with all the lovely, nice, and caring people. God will bless you all!

Thanks alot Marions and nice talking to you again earlier today.

Hello,
I have bad news. The culture of the fluid came back and it was negative. They ruled out everything else and thought that there must be an actual blockage inside her small intestine which required an operation to remove it. They opened up her abdomen and cut off the part where it caused the blockage. As he opened it up, he found that tumor had been spreaded everywhere there. Although he cut off that part, but he doesnt know how long it would be good for and when another blockage will present.
So today her abdomen got big again. she couldnt pee maybe due to the current medications/condition. They’re just monitoring her condition. Earlier in the afternoon when we told her we were going to eat and would be back, she was conscious at that time. Although couldnt talk, but she held our hands as giving a sign to tell us to stay. We asked her if she wanted us to stay and she was nodding. We asked her if she felt very uncomfortable and she was nodding. We were really scare that god would be taking her away from us. About 15 minutes she was feeling much better I guess. She’s now sleeping and her condition was much better than earlier. However, we’re very scared and we don’t know when the scary moment would come back. Yesterday when we found out it was just a blockage in her intestine, we were happy in a way thinking that would take care of the problem and she would soon be discharged to go home. Then the bad news just came after the surgery. We’re all very depressed. I’m praying everyday n hope that she doesn’t have to go through all the tortures. She’s a great person all her life and she doesn’t deserve to be tortured like this.

Hello everyone,
Mom was transferred to ICU on 3/31 when she had a hard time breathing. They had to intubate her. They had to drain the fluid from her intestine (wasn’t just air) and came out to be around 2.8 Liters of fluid. They brought it to test but the result hasn’t came back yet. They treated her with broad spectrum antibiotic with Flagyl, Zosyn, and Vancomycin. Her wbc was 22 but went down to 12 today. Once they get the result back, they’ll streamline it down to more specific antibiotics. They still dont know what really cause her distended stomach yet. They continue to take CT scans everyday trying to trace down what cause the blockage. They said their last option would be cutting it open and physically see what causes the blockage but they really want to avoid that. As for now, it seems like they’ll have to keep drawing out fluid from her intestine everyday the fluid couldnt be get rid off by her own system. I wonder if anybody experienced this before and how it was treated?

Thanks Marion,
Honestly, from what happened so far, I don’t see her oncologist cares much except maybe for the money he got. When we told him his assistant that mom was hospitalized, he didnt even come by to check out how mom was doing. He didnt even call us to keep him updated on the status and this is the 3rd time already. Maybe he’s extremely busy but if I was a doctor and knowing my patient go through that, I would care more than just that. Seems like he only cares about mom would get her chemo cycle regardless of what she went through after each chemo cycle.

Hello,
Mom just had her 3rd chemo cycle. Yep, we delayed it then my brother brought her to see dr. el khoeri for a check up on Monday 3/2, that same day he encouraged mom to do it and said that her tumor marker had gone down. I wasn’t there with them so i didnt know. We requested to get a copy of the lab on Tue but the CA value wasn’t in there. I wonder if he lied ‘cuz he wanted mom to continue getting treatment.
Mom couldn’t pee at all on Tue so we had to take her to the hospital and they had to connect a catheter to drain her urine out and until now she still have it and my bro will take her to see a kidney doctor tomorrow. She had no bowel movement either. It really sucks. It seemed like she’s being tortured with different stuff every time. She had mild back pain this time so it’s not too bad. The only concern we have for her now is her bowel movement and urination. Anyone has any comment about this and any recommendation? Thanks!

Thanks for the info! As for mom, we’ll respect her decision and wait for few days to see what she wants to do. She’s supposed to have her 3rd cycle of chemo this coming Monday but we’ll just delay it. I mean there is no point to ask her to do it when she hates it so much. I mean ever since she was on 2nd cycle or even first cycle, there wasn’t been a day that she looked happy or active and I’m sure that has to do with the side effect of the chemo.