magic
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Matilda,if he looks as if his condition is deteriorating he must get a review and quickly.He should not be on the chemo if he is this unwell because whether it is the chemo causing side effects or leading to an infection or if its the cancer worsening the chemo should be stopped.Then his problems can be sorted out and a plan can be made and if the cancer is worsening he can have a better quality of life by treaing his symptoms Janet
I would think it better to err on the conservative side given his age and definitely go for quality over quantity,more dignified at age 81 Janet
Hi Melissa,as a fellow Australian I did follow Wendys progress.I am very sorry to hear your news,I know how hard it was for her living up North and having to travel long distances for scans etc.She spoke about her family so lovingly we could tell that she was a special type my sincere condolences Janet
My huband,Joel did pretty well considering the very limited time we had.He wrote a series of poems about his experiences and feelings from the time he was diagnosed.He was a journalist and poet.He lined up his best friend and brother to publish these in a book after he was gone.He planned to write 12 but managed 6.
It was great for us to read them and it must have been wonderful for him working on them.He also had a special talk with each of his sons to try to prepare them and to give them a chance to tell him how much they loved him and have a bit of a cry together.
I think it all helped us.We were sad but we didnt have anything left unsaid
JanetKate it is very shocking ,the speed at which this cancer can carry people away.I am an RN and have seldom seen the speed of a cancer like cc in my work.I lost my husband within 3 months at the age of 58 and it was picked up during a routine mens health check with no symptoms.This is a great supportive site but unfortunately even though there are some success stories here there are many like your mum who die so very quickly Janet
My condolences to you and your family.What a difficult time you have experienced.Thankyou for letting us know,we do know how you feel as sadly we have lived through similar times. Janet
I think fever from the gemcitabine which is quite common usually occurs in the 1st few days following so this may be an infection,get it checked out Janet
LD how incredibly difficult for you.I sounds as if you did amazingly well.I think those symptoms are the most difficult of all to deal with.You just have to try to remember him as he was.A lot of people do experience that confusion to some extent but it sounds as if it was a huge problem for your husband.It really is a sign that he was very unwell.
Of course you could only give him liquids if the food caused extreme pain,you did not starve him to death,the cancer did that.You did your very best under difficult circumstances but perhaps you need some counselling to talk things through a bit JanetIt is a shock to get that kind of news but it needs to be taken seriously and prepared for because it might go that way and you and your dad need to be ready for that.On the other hand you can always hope for the best because cancer is an unpredictable disease and sometimes slows up without reason.
So be prepared for the worst but keep hoping if that makes sense and try and have some good times with your dad JanetSharon,that was great you had that extra time,but I feel perhaps your husbands condition is worsening.He needs a proper review,because lasix alone can create other problems and needs very careful monitoring.Keep at them!
JanetI think the more important and quite legal issue is making sure we all have a decent will that includes exactly what we want done or not done at the time of serious illness.In my experience it is uneccessary heroics that cause more suffering in the long run.The medications that you mention,Pam are for symptom relief and are part of good palliative care and really that is something everyone deserves Janet
I just wanted to add that chemo does have a low success rate and is not a cure,but there is no real control so you dont know how things would have been without it,particularly for those with no symptoms.I regret that my husband had chemo,it made things worse.Sorry but I think it best if all sides are shown Janet
Of course some people have good results but a large number dont
