tanoland
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Hey, I hope you are getting some help. I had to take care of my 42 year old sister when she passed away in January. Do you have hospice or family? I am praying for you. I know the journey you are about to take and it will be the hardest thing you will ever deal with. But it’s our job to be strong for our sisters…that’s what we are here for. Please know there are people out here praying for you.
It is so weird I am reading this post. I just heard an Alan Jackson song two days ago that made me cry and I was just sure he wrote it for me. It is called Sissy’s song and talks about this woman dying too young. I can’t listen to it without breaking down but it is beautiful. So I know exactly what you are talking about and I can totally feel your pain.
When my sister stopped Chemo it was almost 3 months before she passed too. Once you stop treatment, it goes fast. And the last month, looking back, I realize she wasn’t really with us. They stop caring about things that they normally care about, conversation becomes less and less. It’s all about helping them die. I never, ever thought I could do that especially with someone I loved that much. But God does give you strength because you really have no other choice. You cannot abandon that person. But it is absolutely the hardest thing that you will ever do in your life. I pray for you and your family.
I started out as overly cautious and tried to make sure my sister’s house was spotless and everything was so clean. And then I realized as time went on …the cancer was going to take her so I needed to focus on more important things. I still made sure nobody got around her who had a cold or was sick. And we washed our hands a lot. Other than that, we lived as normal as any other person. That’s the way she wanted it. She didn’t want people to change lifestyles because of cancer. So I think it’s whatever you are comfortable with.
Thanks Pam. Sorry but BIG KU fan here. At least you are not a North Carolina fan.
I appreciate you reading my blog and getting to know how great Shirley was.
Oh and P.S…..dog is rotten. But I adore him.
It is amazing the support you receive and I know that it will get better.
I do hope that the picture I posted of my sister and I on this website will show the world how much I love her. I can feel our love every time I look at that picture.
Thank you guys for the support. I know I get negative on here sometimes…I tried being positive in the beginning and it didn’t work. Thanks for putting up with me.
Wow, this was comforting to see the posts on here this morning. I’m not o.k. She should be here with me. It sucks when during the day I get the need to talk to her or get some advice from her like I did every single day of my life and she is not here. I’m not sure that will ever get better. And I hate that there are so many people going through it. I am sad for everyone.
Because they do grow, they do metastasize and they do cause blockage eventually. And as far as I know, it happens to everyone. I don’t mean to be negative, but from everything I understand, it happens to every single patient.
I understand where Magic is coming from. I tried to be hopeful and positive in the beginning of my sister’s illness. But after researching and my sister at 42 only lasting 11 months, it’s really hard. And everybody on here is very positive and looking for hope. So people like us probably shouldn’t post on here because we are not that way. And it’s not really good for anyone. But I understand exactly what Magic is saying. I feel the same way. Sorry to be such a downer. Shirley has been gone 1 month and 2 days and it just keeps getting worse every day she is gone.
Hi Valerie. I did the exact same thing with my sister until she passed January 23rd. You just take care of them the best you can and hope for as much time as you can get. It hurt more than I can ever tell anyone. I spent so many days and nights sleeping next to her at the hospice house…actually it was only 9 straight days and nights but once I got home, every time I woke up I was sure I could see her face. I would watch to make sure she was still breathing…but then it was over. I feel so sorry for you. At the time you can’t imagine anyone else is going through the same thing you are. But there are so many of us.
And I have found it interesting you are even in the same state as we are. My sister passed at the Kansas City Hospice House.
God Bless you and your family and I am praying for you.
Teresa
You expressed exactly how I felt watching my sister fade away. It was 11 months from the time she was diagnosed to the day she died and she was never the same person from that day on. She was not happy, no matter how hard we tried. Her entire personality was different. A vibrant, care free, loving beautiful person to a worried, sad, scared cancer patient. I am so sorry for you and your family. Absolutely the worst thing in the world to watch someone go through.
my sister has been gone for 13 days and i am crying harder today than i did the day she passed. i don’t think i will ever get better. i don’t care what anyone says.
Shirley’s sister Teresa
I just put my sister’s picture on the faces of this website. I hope it shows up soon so you can all see how beautiful she was!!!
It is amazing how hearing from other people who are affected by this disease or have watched somebody pass away can help so much. I cried so much reading your responses but it felt very good.
The one thing that I hope I portrayed throughout this horrible journey was how much I loved my sister Shirley. She was 42 and left a 13 year old son and a 15 year old daughter. She was my very best friend for 40 years. I have a huge hole in my heart right now. I know that I will make it because I have wonderful children and an awesome husband of 20 years. But it will be a much sadder life than it was supposed to be. I guess I should have made more friends in my life.
But I do want you guys to know that you help people so much on this site. You are wonderful. I never posted much but when I did, I received awesome support. Please know what great work and friendship you give. Thank you again.
Teresa
