darla
Forum Replies Created
-
Posts
-
Dear Kirsty,
I am so sorry for your loss. I know well the feeling of things spiraling out of control. I’ve been there, too. I am glad that Neil died peacefully and at least for him the fight is over and he is no longer suffering or in pain. I know that right now you can not even imagine that things will get better or that life will go on, but it does and it will. In time the pain will ease and although it never really goes away, things will get better and hopefully you will be able to take comfort in the memories of the time you did have with him in your life. Neil will always be with you and your children. Keep him with you forever in your heart and those memories.
My husband was 62 when he lost his short battle with this disease. I thought that was too young, but 42 is definitely to young. My boys were already adults, but it still was and is hard for us at times.
My heart goes out to you and your children at this sad and trying time in your lives. Know that we are all here for you to help and support you in any way that we can.
Love & Hugs,
DarlaDear Jean-Marie,
I am so sorry to hear that Jeff has passed away. There is nothing to be said that will make it better right now, but know that I am thinking of you and your family. Take some comfort in knowing that he is no longer in pain or suffering. Keep him with you forever in your heart and memories of your life together. I have been where you are now and as hard as it is right now, it truly does get better with time. The pain will ease some in time and although it never really goes away, it does get better. Take care and know that we are here to help and support you in any way that we can at this sad and trying time.
Hugs,
DarlaPorter,
So glad to hear all of this. Now relax and enjoy the holidays and birthdays with your kids.
Hugs,
DarlaDear Carl,
I have to agree with everything Marion has said. I too feel that the stronger your love the harder the grieving, but it is a testament to your love for Lynn and it is that love that makes you feel as you do. We have all been where you are now and yes, it does get better, it never truly goes away, but we do learn more how to deal with it and to gradually live our lives again. Yes, it does take time, longer for some than others and that’s OK. A part of you has changed or gone with her, but know that she too is always near you and if you are open to the signs, they are there.
Thinking of you and hoping that things will get better. Take care Carl and know that we are here for you when you need us and are ready to come back and be a part of this wonderful group of people who share this common pain.
Hugs,
DarlaEveryone is different, but this is how my husband was. He tried to keep going and working as long as he could until he just couldn’t any more. I too was in denial and didn’t see how fast he was going down hill. Yes, for him it went rapidly towards the end and he also couldn’t eat and would vomit bile, was totally exhausted all the time and couldn’t sleep. Meds didn’t help him either. I think Lainy’s list may be helpful to you at this point and I agree, he does need hospice. Know that we are all here for you to help in any way that we can.
Hugs,
DarlaDear Mandy,
I am so sorry for your loss. There are no words that will take away the sadness and grief but know that I am thinking of you and your family. Try to take some comfort in knowing that he is no longer suffering or in pain. Keep him forever in your heart and all the memories you have of the happy times that you shared. Know that we are all here for you to help and support you in any way that we can.
Love & Hugs,
DarlaDuke,
I am absolutely speechless and that is so not me. I am so sorry you had to experience this. No one deserves that kind of condescending treatment, but least of all those dealing with this disease who probably are much better informed than most, thanks to this site and the wonderful people on it.
Also hoping for the best results for your niece. Please let us know how she is doing.
Hugs,
DarlaThinking of you Gavin and also your mom & dear dad as I know he is still with you.
I’m a year ahead of you. Over 6 years for Jim. Hard to believe how these years have gone by.
Hugs,
DarlaDear Tom,
So good to hear from you and Ben. Sorry to hear of the turn things have taken, but it sounds like you both are dealing with it all as well as you can. Glad you were able to have a nice Thanksgiving and are looking forward to the rest of the holidays, Ben’s birthday and the boat parade. Yes, just live for today. Tomorrow will come and there is nothing we can do about it. Who knows what tomorrow will bring. Just enjoy every day and make the best of it all. Just take it one day at a time.
Know that I am thinking of you both. Stay strong and remember we are all here for you to help and support you in any way that we can. Please update us on how things are going when you can.
Lots of love and hugs for both of you.
DarlaDear Porter,
Hoping that you will find out that it is nothing to be too concerned about, but I do understand your feeling as you do. Know that we are all here with fingers crossed hoping for the best. Keep us posted as to what is going on. and know that I am thinking of you. Wishing you lots of luck & love.
Hugs,
DarlaDear Mary,
No Mary, you are not crazy. This is pretty normal for most who are in our situation. My Jim has been gone over 6 years, Sept 2, 2008, and I still have bad days. I too have lost several friends and relatives recently. A very good friend died this summer and then on his birthday, my mom passed way and a few days later another good friend and on & on it goes. This was in September and it really hit me hard. I basically am doing OK, but some days are much harder than others. I don’t think the feelings ever really go away, we just learn better how to deal with things.
I haven’t had any counseling or meds either, but I am fortunate that I have a very close friend who’s husband passed away 3 months after Jim and out situations are so much a like that we know, understand and can talk things through with each other. I also have a group of friends we have known for years as couples and now all the husbands have passed away. Jim was actually the last one. I keep in touch with them and we get together once a month for lunch. This site, and those friends are what get me through those hard times.
Keeping busy does help and I think you could use someone who you can talk to honestly about your feelings who truly gets it. Unfortunately, unless they are in the same situation, they really don’t get it. Most just think we are doing fine. They haven’t a clue.
Vent all you want or need to Mary you are not being stupid. Just expressing how you feel. It does help. Come here and share your feelings when you need to. That’s what we are all here for. To help and support each other in any way that we can.
Yes, this too shall pass, but you never know what or when it will hit you again. Take care Mary. Hoping you can find ways to work through these feelings.
Love & Hugs,
DarlaLainy, I too still believe in the liver fluke theory as Jim was in the service during Viet Nam, I think it was already there in the bile ducts and the statins may just have brought it to life and made it develop more quickly. This is all just assumption on may part. Jim was never sick either other than having to have his appendix removed years ago. After being on the statins he was also told he was board line diabetic.
Deb, Jim was thin and had not smoked or drank in years. Being thin worked against him as he didn’t have anything extra to help fight this. Was also very active until the CC.
Interesting that I also know of a young man who was an entertainer and toured in those countries who also died from CC in his late 40’s.
And so it goes. We may never get the answers.
