Racing for Hope Journal Entry 9

Well after the first marathon, it was back to normal life. Training runs, work, doctor appointments with Mandy, the everyday anxiety and fear that something is going to be wrong the next time we are at the doctor’s, and of course raising our little girls.

We headed into February and cholangiocarcinoma awareness month with a huge win! Mandy had her drain removed!!! You know the drain that was only supposed to be in for like 2 weeks but was actually in for like 2 plus months, yea that one! We are heading into Cholangiocarcinoma Day with a stent removal happening a few days prior to the 12th.

I’m terrified that something is going to happen like last time. I am afraid we will have to go back to the hospital that night.  I’m afraid I am going to see my wife in so much pain and have the same feelings return as last time! But since then, I have reached out to the Foundation, they have set me up with an amazing mentor who is helping me deal with those thoughts and feelings! I’m not sure how I would be doing if it wasn’t for that program that the foundation offers. So now another reason why has been added, to help other caregivers get the help that we need with the feelings and emotions that not everyone else understands.

On a positive note, for Valentine’s Day, I have started a new tradition. Every day my girls wake up, there is a note on their door as to why they are special and why I love them. This includes Mandy, not just my little girls. Also, I’m about 3 weeks from marathon #2 and under 1 month from marathon #3. To say I’m nervous is an understatement!